Basically Bland

2010-03-07T23:00:00.000-06:00

So needless to say that my utter abundance of free time lately has lead me with thinking. And I've thought. Not about much in particular, sometimes maintaining balance takes a fair amount of concentration. =P

Some people went asking me what I was going to do for a job now. I have horrible flashbacks to Dillards. I makes me break out in hives just imagining the that brain dead anthill of insufferable peons talking down to me like I'm nothing. If I can say, fuck that to school, I can say fuck that to you too Dillards. You fat asshole. I hope you microwave your overpriced, cheapass dishware and get cancer.

I have no idea what I'm going to do for money. Money. Money. moneymoneymoneymoney. I found a way to make more money at least in the short term. You know. Until I get on my feet, figituritively speaking because right now I can't do much for standing. Half of saving money is not spending money. Why the hell do I need to dump money into a dump of an apartment? That's what I asked myself around 5am sometime yesterday I think. getting rid of this thing is something that ended up being pretty easy. Sure I had to be creative. But being creative is what I do best aside from being drunk and useless. XD

I managed to sublease out to a near sighted Armenian lesbian... I sent her pictures of Justin with promises of an arranged marriage AND BAM. Moneies?! I got moneies!!! PRORATE BITCH!!! I got $275. and some odd change. Do you have any idea what kind of money that is to someone? That's like enough money forever! Life is an adventure!!! I"M WELL EQUIPED NAAAAW!!

2010-03-05T20:34:00.000-06:00

Wow, sorry for the lack of updates this month! I've been busy as a bee! Not with school though! Man, am I glad I'm done with that. I should probably back up. From what I can remember, somewhere around the end of February, it got to be pretty clear that school wasn't working out. Papers, papers, papers. What's the point in all of these papers. What's the point of school. I'm tired of all of this! I want to do things with my life, enough of this incessant buzzing of papers.

Sitting inside day after day, staying up night after night, only to have one professor after the other bitch and moan at me that I'm just not trying hard enough. That's not living life! 'Work ahead', they say, 'start now' they say... I don't see how I'm ever supposed to do any of that when I'm working on or researching any of the 2 or sometimes 3 papers due this week. Somewhere around my fourth consecutive all-nighter I finally said 'fuck this'.

Let me tell you, the next couple of days, I have never felt so relaxed. Most of it is in a drunken haze and I don't really remember much of it, and really I couldn't even keep track of the days as I didn't leave the apartment much. I've been pretty good about taking Advil and drinking lots of water before I pass out, so amid the occasional hangover, I've never felt more rested or refreshed. I'm pretty sure that school is just a highly popularized form of suicide.

Hanoko 003 ~ Order in the Sunny Meadow

2010-02-26T21:31:00.003-06:00

Finished the audio for number 3 today. (Youtube kind of set it all off anyway :/ )

Abbrev.

2010-02-22T15:32:00.004-06:00

So I'm embroiled in my reading for Human Variation and I keep getting confused and distracted. I'm sure the material is doing it's part as the scope feels less focused and defined than in past weeks. But a large part of it is due to the fact that I keep misreading an abbreviation in my mind. LD. What does that mean to you?

In the world of this week's Human Variation assignments, it means 'Linkage Disequilibrium', or 'the nonrandom association of alleles'. In that context it's neat because it's a means of variation in the genetic code beyond single point changes. But the problem is that for the longest time I read strategies for a certain children's card game and, unless I keep a laser focus, I read LD as 'Land Destruction', one of the most annoying, pathological game strategies. I keep hitting LD in this 15 page article and my gut reaction says 'ewwww, I hate LD'. I don't want to read about LD because if I agree with it, it's just going to be bitching and moaning, and if I don't I'm going to find myself in direct opposition to whoever thinks it's a justified deck theme. It takes me a moment to remember: 'Human Variation. LD is kind of cool.'

Abbreviations can be used because of relevance. They only make sense under the assumption that both the reader and the writer have similar background experiences. They cease to provide a convenient, abbreviated form of communication, however, once they become homophones in the written word.

One Must Never Call the Police Dumb.

2010-02-16T13:39:00.008-06:00

I spent the majority of my discussion today in Human Variation writhing in mental agony because the professor, in trying to argue that some obvious morphological traits may not be considered adaptations if we can't know their function, used the plates of stegosaurus as an example. "We have theories but we can't say it's an adaptation if we don't know that it's something affecting an organism's survival against a selective force" what was said was something to that effect.

Thinking about it now, I get the point she was trying to make, but that example was outright terrible! The implication is that we don't know the exact function of the Stegosaurus's plates, so how do we know they were evolved to increase fitness and aren't a byproduct to something else. My mind kind of exploded out my mouth in a not good way; I can't even articulate how insane that all sounds to me; those kinds of structure arise, if infrequently, in the Triassic, Jurassic, and Cretaceous periods. Similar structures appear on each of the three main lineages of dinosaurs: Theropods, Sauropods, and Ornithischians like Stegosaurus. It's one of the most classic examples of Homoplasy I ever thought of! (aside from the whole fly-wing, bird-wing, bat-wing comparison). It's clear that with several different and yet similar structures among large animals of the Mesozoic that these find structures were being used for something communication, mating, heat regulation... something! Unfortunately I've never been articulate when my mind explodes in dinosaur rage and I made myself look an ass in class.

More towards the end I asked her if she ever shaved a polar bear. I don't know what it is with that class in particular, but I feel like I end up looking more like a freak every week I'm in there.

EDIT: I should probably say that although Stegosaurus and his plates are a bad example, you could talk about that weird space in his hip where people thought he had a second brain for the longest time. Or you swtich species entirely! Go to the Segnosaurs, no one even know what the hell those things are anyways.

Fail Cake

2010-02-15T22:08:00.005-06:00

We experienced a set back today. I bombed a test and couldn't flail my Lit presentation/paper together on time. I feel like I didn't have a weekend at all, which is weird because I know I spent time relaxing and I hung out with friends. Obviously I've lost my mind, so it's a good thing I had the forethought to schedule some 'talk me through stress' time tomorrow morning. The problem is that I have papers etc due tomorrow right after my appointment, so I had to call in some substitutes for therapy: Fail Cake.

The rules of Fail Cake: Fail Cake must be delicious. Fail Cake must be rich. In fact Fail Cake must be so delicious and rich that while eating Fail Cake, all you can think about is Fail Cake. Fail Cake cannot be eaten beside milk. Fail Cake's unavoidable Fail Cake Sugar Coma is an acceptable time to Fail Cake Sugar Nap in public like a loon. After awakening from Fail Cake Sugar Nap, it's time to tackle a world where you're not eating Fail Cake for a while.

Fail Cake: because actual success is cake in itself.

Heebie Jeebies

2010-02-13T17:17:00.002-06:00

Have you ever been in a public sit-down place with friends, and there's talking and laughing to be had? And then you get that weird feeling like someone is watching you, and out of the corner of your eye you can see someone eye-locked dead in on your conversation. It's kind of creepy, yes? Why the hell do people do that?

Rainy Day. :)

2010-02-11T19:25:00.004-06:00

I feel drunk in rain

the ground seems so uncertain

Refrigerator.

Internet Profiling

2010-02-10T15:35:00.003-06:00

I was in one of my classes the other day to, you know, to break up the monotony of being physically in class. One of the main themes we talked about, on the subject of memoirs, was self representation. In the terms of the internet, self representation takes on a whole new dynamic. There's a drastic change between representation and reality in some communities, like with furries. (If anyone isn't familiar with what a 'furry' is, take the safe search off and Google 'yiff'. Be amazed at the capacity of the human imagination.) But even the majority of users (and therefore the majority of people) realize that 'webpresentation has become very close to a real life representation. People get up, dress for the day, and check their email. Throughout the day, like someone checking their hair in a mirror, people check their Facebook pages. I have friends that police the activity of Friends on their Facebook page because a bad Facebook associations are just as bad as having real life delinquent friends. In this way, you could say that the internet has given people just another way to represent themselves in the present, their virtual life in parallel to their real life.

There's a strange flip side to this though. Online profiles and the ilk behave a little differently than real life representations. Unlike casual associations, where people drift apart and forget, the online world remains pristinely static. For instance, if you were to ask old high school acquaintances what they thought about me, you'd probably get a short description of poorly timelined events... maybe even some rumors if you were lucky; I wasn't ever someone that noticeable or popular. However, my old high-school LiveJournal is still exactly how I left it. All the things that fade in the memory of people are preserved in perfect stasis (until I eventually get uneasy and delete them, as I'm sure I'll need to do one day when I go job hunting).

The reason I'll probably have to delete them though is another disconnect: while these self representations are all brutally honest (There's basically one one thing that I never mention in any of them), these perfect copies of frames in time are often outdated! Self representation online makes itself difficult when you look at honest representations that are now disingenuous as they are dated but presented in the present tense. No where on my LifeJournal is written a preface that says "This is me 10 years ago, and here's some context that relates it to today." If you didn't pay attention to the dates, you'd think I was still a 15 year old angst riddled boy living at home and swimming at ungodly hours each morning. This makes online profiles of any sort almost parodies of real life if they aren't properly maintained. Casual profiles made on whim stand just as strongly, shouting to the hills your words at that moment just as strongly six months or two years later. Text on a page doesn't fade. The passion and even the state of mind you write in it doesn't fade off web pages, it doesn't turn yellow and brittle either. Self representations online are so perfectly enduring that they often surprise even ourselves when we find them later.

Online representations are often like memoirs in that they allow us to portray ourselves through thought and words, but they are also distinctly different in that they're more alike to scribbles on scraps of indestructible paper than a formal published book. I was just thinking that today.

Marriage Trials

2010-02-05T22:56:00.003-06:00

Itching to see a big gay production? This website has constructed reenactments of the first few hours of the first day of court proceedings, based on released transcripts and descriptions from people watching the trail in person. The dialog is accurate, in all it's dry, droning glory.

It's worth mentioning that while the words are there and the actors portraying the transcript and description appear to make attempts to look and sound similar, the nuances of words and the exact nuances of things like stutters and pauses and the like will be different. This shouldn't be confused with actual trial footage. If you watch it, listen for words, not necessarily for presentation, which is put on to make distribution of the exact dialog palatable.

Late Night Pitter Patter

2010-02-05T11:16:00.002-06:00

The ferrets were keeping me up last night. Norman Bugbear especially was ringing bars because he wanted to play... and I wanted to sleep. So I wheeled them out in to the living room and went to bed. Norman kept going at it though for a while longer before he suddenly stopped.

I was almost asleep when I thought I heard little pattering on the tile in the hallway. I thought I imagined it at first and then he ran into a wall and it became clear that he was on the loose and I had to get up. Turns out the bottom of the cage had shifted off the base and Norman was loose. I walked out in the hallway and Norman poked his little white head out of Justin's room; he wanted to play 'chase'... I was tired... so I made like I was walking away and he scuttled out to chase me and scooped him up when he got close. I fixed the cage and put him back in before flopping back into bed. Norman stared at me in utter confusion.

I need to get a ferret wheel to tire these things out.

Get Time Machine for Gertrude Stein

2010-01-31T14:34:00.008-06:00

Reading Rainbow. You remember Reading Rainbow right? Encouraging the young to read, good, old, classic-'Butterfly in the Sky' Lamar told us "But you don't have to take my word for it" and cut away to a bright eyed child hefting up a bright and colorful book. Although the clear agenda of that show (and as in all cases, the word 'agenda' should be read with evil undertones) is to promote reading, the child testimonials did a good job exemplifying the reasons people like to read: most simply, it's enjoyable.

For this week's assignment in my literature class, I had to read Gertrude Stein's convoluted mess of an impossibility: "The Autobiography of Alice Toklas by Gertrude Stein." Mired in relating this hopeless abomination to anything cerebral, I can't help imagine anything that could possibly be further from Reading Rainbow's enamoring ideal. If we lived in a strong-arm totalitarian government, that would permit someone younger than the age of consent, to be forced to read this book and then present it on television, the colorful 80's style transition effects would unveil a dead child slumped over and next to the smoking gun on the table, Gertrude Stein's book would be propped up. This book is insufferably pointless and bad. Not bad in the way that 'it's just not the material I'm interested in', because I've been known to enjoy reading biographies and autobiographies. Not bad in the way that I just couldn't 'get it.' Trust me, I got this book. I endured headaches and repeated flaring bouts of depression slogging from one uneventful page to the next, all babbling anecdotes as Gertrude Stein, devoted partner to Alice B Toklas, writes her autobiography for her and shifts the entire focus back on to Gertrude Stein.

I'm sure she thought it was very clever. I know she thinks everything she does is very clever. This entire book does nothing but recount all the ways Toklas (as written by Stein) thinks that Gertrude Stein is nothing short of a demigod of genius. There is no plot, there are certainly no nuances of a relationship between the two, THERE IS ONLY STEIN. Whomever Stein interacts with in one sampling to the next changes a little, but right as rain, each one doesn't do anything but tell Stein what a damn godsend genius she is.

Please don't misunderstand me. I'm not angry that this book has no substance; I've read lots of things in the spectrum of substance-lite to no substance. I endured a friend reading me her favorite Harry-slash-Drake fan fiction (And a big FU to Rowling by the way, I swear the only reason you conceived the polyjuice potion was to help sexually repressed fans toolbox their porn writing). Gertrude Stein manages to write in such a way that is cognitively impossible to comprehend. Reading this book, I'm painfully aware that she predates computers and spell check. Halfway through the book I'm fairly convinced that she predates the formal structure the English language, reading English literature a century further back never gave me this much trouble. Trying to read this alphabet soup of mis-punctuation I have to assume that the genius Mademoiselle Stein is illiterate and borderline mentally impaired. 49% of her sentences are fragments and another 49% are run-on-sentences with a jumble of punctuation. The remaining 2% of 'genius' are, of course, both:

"Gertrude Stein has never ceased to be thankful to her mother for neither forgetting or forgetting. Imagine, she has said to me, if my mother had forgiven her sister-in-law and my father had gone into business with my uncle and we had lived and been brought up in New York, imagine, she says, how horrible. We would have been rich instead of being reasonably poor but imagine how horrible to have been brought up in New York."

I literally pulled that off the page I was reviewing before I started writing this blog. I didn't go searching for it. Imagine, an entire book with nothing but those sentences, divided into seven chapters that themselves feel like individual books in a series! Now imagine that there is absolutely no point to anything written, other than of course, letting Gertrude Stein publicly self-service her ego. The chapters themselves are divided by time periods, which would help organize a coherent thought process, but those the time periods outlined are are really more of general topics than limitations to the stream of consciousness/dialog; Stein drifts back to events that happened before or to conversations that happened afterward with little recognizable indication between past-past, past-present, and past-future.

In short, this book is bad. Bad in a way that I thought no book could ever really acheive. Some books are bad because they have no real substance to them. Some books are bad because they are poorly organized or they're not well written. Some books are bad because you get tired of hearing the author parrot the people around them into saying how much they whorship the authors ever waking momment. This book does all the above, but in such a long, monotonous, utterly boring way that it can't even turn 'bad' full circle into 'so bad it's good'. This book made me not want to never read another book or anything else ever again. I wish there was a way to gouge this book from my memory. I wish I could locate the parts of my brain where this book, without consent, took up a part of my memory, so that I could set fire to it and sear it out of my existence forever. I wish I could invent a time machine for the sole purpose of going back and slapping Stein and her publisher full in the face... or damn near anything to try to stop what could quite possibly be the worst thing to ever happen to the english lanuage: this book. And so that's where they book got me. 'Get Time Machine for Gertrude Stein.'

The Turbo Cynic

2010-01-28T19:33:00.004-06:00

Oh my! Where have you been all of my life?!

I need to get one of these that loops this for life. Think of the blissful simplicity of being an agitated pessimistic asshole! Oh how I'd sleep at night if I didn't have the vestigial dregs of empathy or consideration.

Turning Myself In! I Need Help!

2010-01-27T17:55:00.003-06:00

So it shouldn't come as any surprise that I'm insane. I'm talking about being mentally unstable... chemically impulsive... prone to unprovoked wild bouts of seemingly random out-of-my-mind, Adam-'Farmer in the Dell' crazy over here!

That's what I'm hoping I won't be saying next week. Why would I think that? Because I'm about to utilize A&M's (probably much under-utilized) counseling services. I'm not being forced against my will or anything. I've never really liked the idea of talking about feelings to strangers before, but I've sometimes wondered if it could help. I don't feel like I'm about to have a mental break down or anything; in other words I don't feel explicitly vulnerable, but at the same time I'm recognizing a little bit of stress stirring up pensive lethargy in my semester so far... so assuming all this cockamamie works, I stand to get some real benefit from it. It's a free service, so I figure why not. Also it'll give me something to blog about.

I should probably commit to being disappointed by writing down my expectations for this: I'm hoping that I can be given someone who will listen with my problems and concerns and give me back perspective and alternative options for how to overcome the walls I keep stumbling over, using the university's other facilities as a platform to lead off from.

So follow me along on a magical journey, as I sign up at the Student Counseling Center: I called in and was directed to open up a registration file online based off the UIN. The website services were listed. I guess they made divisions, but overall it came off as being pretty vague. It didn't tell me who I would be talking with, I was disappointed that I wasn't bludgeoned with notifications that my privacy would be protected in this service. (That's something I'd kind of like to be bludgeoned with)

From there I had to enter some basic information about me. Apparently scholastic probation can require some people to go to this thing. If this service is what I think it is, I have to wonder why I wasn't put on it when I was struggling in my various majors... but I'm getting ahead of myself. We don't know how effective this is going to be yet. Maybe it's a waste of time.

I'm treated to a long list of common sources of stress and I have to mark all the ones that I feel have stressed my life in the past 2 weeks and to what extent. I can see how a lot of them overlap... some are really vague (like 'Depression' and 'Decision Making') and some are really explicit ('Conflict with Parents on Career Choice' and 'Reading/Comprehending Textbooks'). The one that really caught my eye going down was 'Math Anxiety', but if I were to begin to give my opinion of the (College Station) A&M Math Department, we'd get way off track. There were so many things listed I had a hard time keeping them all relative. I ended up just marking the ones I though applied to me first and then went back to determine the severity. I picked 'Academics/Coursework/Grades', 'Anxiety/Fear/Nervousness', 'Finding Occupational Information', 'Dating Concerns' and a few others. I feel like I sound like a crack head when I list them out like that, but trust me I feel better already passing over all the ones I didn't feel stressed by. See! Already I feel more sane and competent! Success!

From there I had to enter in short sentences why I wanted to use the service and the likely hood I felt like counseling would help (I guess that one is to catch those sent by advisors?). Then I had to identify and rank the severity of feelings, like I did above. Like I said, most of this is is pretty basic, unexciting, and largely preemptive (Anxiety again?) After that I had to do the same with a list of strengths (I think I'm 'moderately' good at 'coping with stress' and I have a 'good sense of humor'). Wow, and now I'm feeling even more capable! It's like they channeled everything additive about preteen online quizzes! (Hmmm, I don't know what Harry Potter character I am...)

With that done, it was on to what looked like a near to last page: lots of confidentiality stuff. (So it is in there after all!) It also asked if they were allowed to record sessions on audio or video... it recommended allowing recording for better counseling options; I don't really have a problem with that sort of thing... although I still don't understand why that would make a difference. After that it brought up a list of open appointment times, the earliest being this Friday and the latest being 2 weeks away. I got an early Friday appointment and that's all there was to it.

We'll see how this all goes. Hopefully this is an opportunity to be even more impressed with my university.

Locked Out

2010-01-26T11:54:00.003-06:00

It kind of annoys me when teachers lock doors before classes start. I mean I get it, they don't want people coming in late and disrupting their class. I can see how that part would easily get annoying. I'd be a little insulted if my students never showed up on time. But on the other side of the coin it's not like students don't get charged for coming late. 'Late work not accepted' is an easy way to combat that. Just have stuff due at the beginning and don't take it late. And it's not like professors are grading machines, professors work with students all the time and I'd like to think it's easy to know who needs a break and who doesn't care about your class.

Exhibit A: I got locked out of my class today. Suffice to say, I'm ignored at the door. I miss a grade that was due at the beginning, I get counted 'absent' and arbitrarily lose more points, but ultimately I miss the lecture/discussion that I read up for and was actually looking forward to. This isn't a class I took because I'm trying to make a grade and graduate, it's actually the one that I was most excited about taking! And I'm hoping it applies toward a job! (Would I be overloading my hours otherwise? No. I'm lazy.) Of course after three days of it all I've gotten is bad juju. (._. ) * disappointments*

Locking the door, I can see why you'd do it, and professors are allowed to make up their classes however they want... but it still feels so... juvenile. Kind of like how showing to class late is juvenile? Yes. I'd say it's just about exactly that bad.

Beck, Palin, Fox News

2010-01-21T13:38:00.014-06:00

It's kind of old news now... but then again I have lot of old news I never logged on about.

Sarah Palin hired by Fox News? I wasn't foso if i wuz goin 2 *headdesk or lolz when I hear dat (trendy is like a second language to me).

I think I might have done both, a dangerous maneuver to be done ~~while driving~~, leave it to professionals, please. To welcome her on board Glen Beck, clearly enamored with big bright puppy dog eyes, "interviewed" her. This 'let me read you pages of my journal' (not even kidding) stuff is just plaine sappy! Five minutes into the beginning and already you can tell this is going to be an hour of sweet, sweet, right-wing love poetry.

Remember back in the campaign, when right wingers were calling Obama the antichrist because some people were more or less worshipping him like an idol... I'm curious to know if you see any parallels to that here. To worship Omaba, you had to be hopelessly optimistic. Apparently, to roll on with the now golden Palin cash cow, you need to be able to suspend you knowledge of basic american history (see later below).

It's an hour long interview. There's a lot of... material. More than enough for the... *drumroll*

NEW SARAH PALIN DRINKING GAME!!!

Here's how you play at home: sit down and watch Sarah Palin talking with alcohol. But every time she says something hilariously dumb, remember her legions of followers and her ever expanding political platform and drink until the world is happy again. Just to warn you, no one actually wins the Sarah Palin Drinking Game, it's over when the last person loses.

Need a sample round? Get ready and set, then watch the clip below!

Now lets not be obvious. Lets give her at least the benefit of the doubt and try to pretend that she avoided the most popular, common answer of 'Thomas Jefferson' in order to seem more rogue... so she really didn't find herself giving a five year old 'don't know it' answer of 'All of them!' and really she was so well informed that OH MY GOD THE COGNITIVE DISSONANCE JUST CAUSED THE CAPILLARIES IN MY LEFT EYE TO HEMORRHAGE!!!
Happy Drinking!!!

Now Blogs = Education?

2010-01-20T23:03:00.006-06:00

I attended my english/studies class today. The professor was just as energetic as I remember her being last semester before I had to switch out of her class for physical anthro. We spent the first half of the class talking about blogs. Apparently class themed blogging is now the way some classes involve students. She described what a blog is (to a generation that grew up on xanga and livejournal ;-P) and I thought to myself... oh yeah... I have some of those...

I really like the idea... I just hope I'm not expected to try to sound smart or anything :p

Ball Drop 2009

2010-01-16T23:28:00.007-06:00

It's been a crappy break, not going to lie. I feel like I've spent this last half of it stressing out or being depressed. Mom is done with surgeries though and I'm eager for school to start up! But before I run galavanting off into the sunset, I wanted to look back on a few parts of 2009. Here's a brief rundown of most of the important stuff roughly in order:

Started out trying to re-date
Attending Blinn
Loved dead people class
Thought I had cavities (but didn't)
Adopted the infamous ferrets from the shelter
Transfered back to A&M (Stat=no fun. Rec=great!)
Got a DSi
Trip to Las Vegas
Tried hiring artists (yikes!)
Broke up
Grandpa passed away
Transfered back to A&M (again. damn you Howdy)
Tried dating people (who I found myself for the first time)
Went to an awkward 'passion party' (broke her foot how?)
Ferrets fighting fleas!! Massive bombing maneuvers!
Lost my damn mind
Made lots of new friends around Sweets
Grim died
Obama spoke on campus
Annna lived with me!
Tried Nanowrimo
Wrote a research paper on Animorphs
Ran a half marathon with mom, dad, and sarah
made all As and Bs!
Trip to Austin!
xmas with mom in the hospital
scoured San Antonio for bubble tea
We all watched Samuel L Jackson get eaten Mako sharks for new years!

Goodbye 2009 and all your instability! You were a year of lots of changes, transitions, and a heaping dose of drama... but now get out

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

A little late is better than never, I'm officially starting 2010 when I wake up tomorrow! here's to a rockin year in 010!

Ferret XMas

2009-12-22T23:17:00.001-06:00

The ferrets sure love Christmas. I don't think it has anything to do with the birth of their lord and savior (little known fact: Ferret Jesus was born the exact same moment as human Jesus... but they technically call him *squeak-squeak-low-dooking-noise*). I think it has more to do with travel and all the new random crap that comes with the season.

In addition to their accordion style ferret tunnel, which they never get tired of running through even when it's laid out in the same place (as if it was going to lead somewhere different... no... it's just the same open space of floor two feet away), they also get to smell new presents as I bring them home... wrapping papers and tape (OOOH TAPE!!!). For some reason they also never seem to get tired of crawling in plastic bags. I think it has something to do with the noise and the static cling... but who the hell could even tell what a ferret's thinking.

Life as a ferret must be either insanely exciting or maddeningly frantic.

DSi Review

2009-12-21T23:54:00.001-06:00

The DSi was released somewhere around 8 to 10 months ago, marketed as an upgraded DS lite (which was an upgraded DS). While the DS lite was almost a necessary improvement over the DS, which looked like a prototype model (and some say it was the rushed prototype released after news leaked it early), the DSi sported more subtle changes. It's slightly smaller, has two small cheap cameras, and features a much improved 'channel' like interface reminiscent of the Wii. Most noteably it lost the Game Boy Advance slot, meaning that it can only play DS games. Of course this means that it cannot also play DS games that required the GBA as a peripheral spot.

I've had mine for almost a year, and to be honest I really haven't used it much differently than the DS lite before I traded it in. People who are looking to just play games don't really have a need for a DSi. It has a music player that features a limited mixer, it's fun. I played Lady Gaga's Bad Romance on it and altered her voice to sound male... strangely entertaining. However, don't confuse this with an MP3 player. It's not.

The cameras are limited too; the quality is comparable to a cell phone. There are some fun doodling utilities, but like the mixer, these are mostly fun... they aren't for serious pictures.

The channel system is interesting. Once you accept that the DSi is a portable game system that also tries to be a bit of a 'jack-of-all-trades' toy, you really see that the channel system is at the heart. The DSi store, where you purchase applications, has been up for a while. There's are a variety of puzzle games and a few types of calculator and alarm clock applications. Very few of these stand as 'games' and usually just seem more like 'stuff to do if you're bored enough'. There are some fun titles though. And some applications are worth trying out.

Internet connectivity is a big thing nowadays. The DSi takes the the DS lite clearly in this department. An upgrade that came out this past August allowed pictures in the album to publish directly to facebook. I'm not sure why exactly they picked to route it only to that one social networking site... I wouldn't have minded if it had routed it to a picture site like Photobucket or a blog... but Facebook is the most popular, so it works.

The lack of Blue Tooth technology and the elimination of the GBA peripheral port makes the DSi limited. In this respect it is very much like a 'toy', with very distinct boundaries and an ill defined purpose. There are fun features on it, but really it feels like half the fun is trying to incorporate them into your daily life somehow. That's a strange way to conceptualize a game system. While I can't say I agree with everything that Nintendo has made the DSi into, I can say that it is a neat little gizmo that really makes no real pretensions at being anything more than a little light fun.

Break-fest!!!

2009-12-20T23:54:00.000-06:00

You know, I kind of miss November. Not because I was in school then. As much as I enjoyed learning, and I did, I'm happy to be out for a while. But I had a list of exciting event in November. Now it's December, and really I got nothing. December is signifigantly lamer than November, afterall, I pretty much spent the first half finishing up school. And on top of that, I had, although willful, obigatory and time consuming travel plans to arrange everything by. With only ten days left in December, nay 2009, I'm thinking I'll do my best to inject a couple of exciting events and projects to spice up life. I can't say life sucks, but I can say that it's a lot more boring since November ended... :(

Tune in tomorrow to start a reel of exciting plans! Damn it, I'm going to enjoy my break to the fullest and stop being such a lardass about everything! (first I'll need an annoying catch phrase... "November Rocks" and "November is Awesome" are pretty hard to beat though... they were so catchy)

Out of In Your Face -book

2009-12-17T21:54:00.003-06:00

Oh internet, you are a wonder. You're fucking massive! I don't think humans were meant to be as connected as the functionality seems to put us sometimes; and that uncomfortably close proximity is only made possible by the internet!

Case in point, I submit Facebook. A social networking site, it allows you to keep up with an absurd number of people as they continue to update every inane detail of their life. In the case of my close friends, I really appreciate it. In the case of casual acquaintances, I guess it's kind of neat. I mean it helps me get to know them better without all that awkward... what did they use to call it? Conversation? As for people I really don't talk to though it's annoying.

I really don't care that they uploaded pictures, have a tough status update, or that they lost their phone and need the numbers of all their real friends. We don't talk and have no real impact or contact on each other's life. We have nothing in common and there really is no point in staying so up to date on people who have, and never really, had anything to do with my life. I might as well be following strangers. Scratch that! A lot of these people are in their own circle of friends. Bascially I just get updates about how they all get along with each other... which is all well and good... but basically I feel like I'm looking into a Alpaca Enthusiast Group meeting; I have no real attachment to alpacas.

But I can't un-friend them, that seems a little antagonistic. There must be a compromise. What's that Facebook? 'Hide' is a feature that can 'Hide' people right out off my reading list? You mean I can actually use facebook and ignore people I don't particularly care about? Why it's just like real life! *click*click*click*click*click*click*and *click* Ahhh, I now have a little breathing distance.

As the internet was conceived a way to connect everyone in near limitless ways, I think it's also key to let us all to disconnect a little bit. Ahhh... Facebook hasn't jumped this much closer to serenity since I blocked Farmville!

Snow!

2009-12-04T12:40:00.002-06:00

I couldn't tell you if it's a Texas thing, but everyone gets really excited about seeing snow. Is it because snow is an indicator of uncomfrotably cold weather? Probably not. Is it because it's a subtle departure from their dull and mundane lives? Even I'm not that cynical. I think it's rooted in something closer to childish wonderment. Snow floats on air and drifts around, it's eye catching and just fun to watch. Enjoy the day! Behold one of mother nature's many screen savers!

Cleaning Cubed

2009-11-28T16:31:00.004-06:00

I started cleaning. I ripped everything out of my truck yesterday and spent this morning blowing everything around my appartment like a huge storm of vacuuming and organizational skills. Too bad I really don't have the time to finish any of it today, I'm writing the rough draft to my now infamous Animorphs paper and working today. I also spend quality time with Kyle and such. But it doesn't really matter if everything in my apartment is completely wrecked (seriously, everything is pretty much blown apart right now), my roommate is still out of town!

Things in life remind me of a Rubics Cube. You have to carefully mess everything up before you can put it back together better than before!

Strength

2009-11-26T21:38:00.004-06:00

I think Thanksgiving may be one of my favorite holidays. I just like the tone. Thanksgiving isn't a tv/radio advertisement guilt trip to make the general public feel obligated to go down a falate superstores and malls across the country. Thanksgiving is nothing but simple dinners with family. You just can't sex that up like you can Valentines day or Christmas. Thanksgiving is nice; being more thankful just feels so introspective and cleansing (and inexpensive).

I have a lot to be thankful for, but the things that I focus on have changed over the years. For years I used to say I was thankful for my house and having my own room and food and having a family and being able to drive myself places.. etc. My list has been changing a little over the past few years in particular though (a lot of things have). Last year was a year I really realized just how strong my family members are. My mom, dad, grandma, and grandpa have all lead full and successful lives that I had never really thought about collectively before. I can tell that a lot of that has passed onto my sister too. This year opened the scope even more. I've met and grown closer to people outside my family with a steady radiating glow of personal fortitude. It's not always obvious at first, but over time you can really see the hope, drive, love and success of people with less innate talent and less than perfect circumstances. You can't help but feel a little bit inspired. Having people like this willingly include me in their lives by choice is what I'm most thankful for this year.

The Fame Monster

2009-11-25T10:22:00.004-06:00

Where The Fame was very 'sparkely' in it's lyrical themes, The Fame Monster is little darker. Gaga makes a lot of references to people in 'the business' acting less than nice to each other. According to Wikipedia(theallknowing).org she wrote these during her tours and promotions of The Fame... so maybe it does fit after all. I was a little disappointed, just because Bad Romance was released in full force first. The rest of the album is good, better than most electronic/dance cds anyways, but Bad Romance is definitely the strongest track. Just because it's Gaga, I was expecting a little more distinction than beep-beep-dance-pop.

She has a strong voice that makes for very energetic music, but it tends to overpower instruments and electronic effects unless they're reined in tight. Most of the tracks have weak moments because of this, her voice is bringing the energy up and the back music just can't seem to keep up with her. Teeth and Bad Romance are the two exceptions to this. Alejandro is fun, if a little bit of a flash back to Ace of Base (it's not a bad thing). Monster and Dance in the Dark are all serviceable, the second or third time I listened to them I was able to overlook the random awkward slow parts. I didn't care for Telephone because the lyrics are unbelievably dumb; it's a collaboration song with Beyonce though, so I'm guessing the radio is going to bludgeon everyone with it regardless. So Happy I Could Die is almost as good as Dance in the Dark but just kind of fizzles out flat. Speechless is a variety inducing ballad. It's not what I typically go to Gaga to hear, but it's decent. There's also a Bad Romance remix by Starship; the original was so good, I wish they had remixed one of the tier 2 tracks instead.

The album is very short. It's practically an EP and I think it was misleading to try to hype it as a completely new album. Still, it's not priced as a full album and the tracks it does have mostly range from average to above average.

I give it 3.5/5.0 Ra Ra Ras.

Eyes

2009-11-17T23:48:00.001-06:00

Cold weather makes me think. It’s good thinking weather. Maybe it’s because you can pretend that a storm is blowing in; prepare for the harsh elements on the way! Survival is key! November is the awesome month. This year, November is full of nothing but great event happening every single week. For whatever reason though, today a little bit of October slipped back in. Now I’m being all ‘contemplative’, particularly about what kind of outlook I should have. Despite what people will tell you, it’s not always best to have a entirely sunny and positive outlook on life; there’s no perfect way to view the world that’ll work magic. For instance, changing to more exhaustive outlooks is impractical if there are insufficient returns. All you’ll accomplish is burning yourself out, trust me I know. But there’s also a downside to just vomiting tar, it makes moments where you feel peaceful and happy a little sad because you know you’re pushing people away. I guess everything is a balance! The key is always remember why you choose a certain outlook in the first place. Finding a way to view the world is a means to an end, not an end to some means.

Artifact

2009-11-16T11:42:00.003-06:00

I walked into my old room in San Antonio on Saturday night, home for the Sunday and tried to go to sleep. At 11:40 I heard a light beeping sound. It's been in my room for as long as I could remember, I've always thought it was a watch I lost somewhere with an alarm set. I went through several watches in high school in particular and I was big into setting alarms; I figured I set it for 11:40 am and the AM/PM thing got switched.. Anyway, I could never find it because of the way the beep echoes, it's impossible to tell which corner of the room it's coming from, and my room isn't even messy or anything!

By some weird coincidence I was able to tell where it was coming from that night. Turns out it wasn't a watch at all (which may be why I had trouble finding to start with). It was a really (really really) cheap PDA I got from sending in Cocoa Pebbles proof of purchases through the mail. I think I remember I ordered sent off for it because it was free and I just liked getting stuff in the mail back then (It was a lot of fun to have free junk delivered... I should start doing that again). I think I played with it for 30 minutes, obviously set an alarm, and then dropped it in a junk drawer. That was almost 10 years ago! This thing has been setting off that soft phantom watch beep alarm every night at exactly 11:40 pm since then!

I thought about how such an insignificant whim could just keep going and going on, as endless as needless. There aren't many things I took up in early high school that still keep going; blogs, stories, movies, books, ideas, ideals, dreams, plans for the future... most of those have undergone radical changes or been outright abandoned. This dumb thing though just kept enduring on for no reason. It made me think about what we really leave behind..

13

2009-11-09T13:40:00.002-06:00

In a moment of weakness and poor judgement, I decided I should sign up for a half marathon in San Antonio this weekend. Have I been training to run 13 miles straight? Nope. Since signing up have I gone running? Not once! Do I think I have ample amounts of free time to pick up another side track event? Probably not. But you know what? November is the month of fucking adventure! Bring it on!

The Fourth Kind: Movie Review

2009-11-08T12:29:00.013-06:00

Life is full of natural wonders. Like a campfire sunrise after a night in wilderness or large roving flocks of birds, somethings just beg you to sit down and enjoy the moment. For reasons I cannot fathom, watching Milla Jovovich (Resident Evil, Fifth Element) act is a similar experience for me. While her movies never end in radical introspection that make me reevaluate the meaning of life, I can't help but enjoy myself. Maybe its because she's a stunning beauty with above average acting and a low set, sensuous voice (it's like sex with chocolate pudding) and maybe its because the movies she does do are fast paced and fun, but I can't help but love any movie she stars in. When I saw trailers for her new movie, an alien abduction thriller, I was shaking with excitment. Enough of my woman crush though, how was the movie?

We'll get there, first I want to say that one thing you have to understand is how hard alien abduction movies are to make. Abductions are complete misunderstandings or hoaxes at worst and infrequent enigmas at best, not much is really compiled. Even details of 'sightings' aren't congruent with each other. The Fourth Kind takes a bold stance, juxtaposing 'dramatizations' with 'archived footage' from a Blair Witch series of audio and video recordings taken from the researcher who is the focal point of the movie.

The Fourth Kind tries to be completely factual, something that not possible for vampire or other equally fantastical movies. That's a pretty difficult job, but it pretty much delivers! Now you can go to this movie and take it apart; it's a freaking alien movie that tries to use archive footage for crying out loud! It's like someone built a house of cards where you're pretty sure one of them is imaginary. But it starts with a bang and does an excellent job of keeping tension. This is a movie that is fast paced and at the same time keeps itself from spinning excessively out of perspective. The camera work, lighting, sound, and direction are tight; it's a classic case of what it takes to make people stay engaged, the very definition of a thriller. It has some components that seem overdone or cheesy, but then it blankets them over with the irrationality and mystery that usually accompanies a god complex; it more or less covers its bases. I have only one small minute criticism for this movie: the exact detail (of the dramatization) of the ending, going off of the archived footage, could have been made more ambiguous.

This movie is a good suspense ride, appropriately punctuated with action and clearly manged with tight direction. The few parts that I thought were overdone while watching the movie were actually the ones that stuck with me when I went home later that night. Don't watch this as a movie trying to convince you of research. Suspend your common sense a little and pretend you're watching Life Time documentary and this will be a fun movie that is the very definition of a thriller! I rate this movie 3.5 out of 5 late night bedroom encounters.

Vista to 7

2009-11-05T16:54:00.005-06:00

Holy cow! To everyone whose computer is infected with Windows Vista (any of the various strains), for the love of God go and upgrade to Windows 7! I made the swtich today and the difference on my little laptop is HUGE! I can see animations! The screen saver actually works! It doesn't take 15 minutes for my computer to start up!

Is Windows 7 better than Leopard? Hells NO! But unlike Vista, it will actually run on a computer! I'm so excited! Running this is like getting a brand new computer that isn't a piece of junk! It feels like a brand new computer! The operating system change is that huge!

[why the hell did they even bother releasing Vista again?]

Enganst

2009-10-24T12:51:00.005-05:00

I was reading over the syllabus for my English class and I found something that pissed me off.

"Exams, discussion questions/ responses, and homework will receive a numeric grade, but all papers and presentations will receive a letter grade, the point-value of which is listed below: A 95, A- 92, B+ 88, B 85, B- 82.. F 59"

Did you notice there's no A+ 100 in there? That's because there's no such thing as a perfect paper (or apparently presentation)! There are a 15 point paper and a 15 presentation. So if I get MAXIMUM points on both of those I still automatically still lose .5 points on my FINAL grade. I'm trying my best to salvage points after a horrific test and a misunderstanding of the attendance policy! No, but go ahead and dock any rounding factor I had. Let's all just round down this go around! No, really it's cool! I understand this is how you save English as a language. Lord knows if kids thought they were getting 100 points on their work instead of 95 points, there's be no point to life as we know it all hell would break lose! Bitch, I hope I get the chance to round down you tax return... because, you know, you technically get so much... but... the system probably might have an error in your favor... so we'll fix that for you. Just to make sure you know how the world works. Isn't learning fun?

I think English teachers do the 'no perfect paper' thing in an attempt to pretend that they aren't the ones determining what good English is. Like there's some all mighty God of English papers that looks down when they leave a stack on the alter at sunset and etches red letter grades in lighting bolts down from heaven as a form of judgement. 'I can't say that your paper is perfect', they're saying, 'because in the grand scheme of things no English paper is really PERFECT.'
Bitch, in the grande scheme of things, when I sign up for this class, I'm promised an OPPORTUNITY to score 100 out of 100 possible points. I know you grade the paper and you personal opinion may resonate with some techniques more than others. I'm writing a paper for your class to be read by you. If you feel like I deserve full credit for fully completing an assignment then I deserve full fucking credit!!

The Fall Atmosphere!!

2009-10-23T12:10:00.002-05:00

I'm in a fantastic mood today. It could because I woke up freezing cold. I love cold, why the hell do I live in a small midwestern Texas town? I've been asking myself that a lot a lot lately. The weather is a big part of it. Would I be terrible to say that social atmosphere is another part? Probably. I'd also probably be incorrect. I know that eventually I'll have to accept the fact that people are pretty universal, especially when they're all put under the same laws. Even if I move up north I doubt some things will change, in fact when I think about it logically I'm sure of it. Realizing that is probably some part of growing up.

If growing up means that I'll reconcile everything I've ever wanted out of life, I'll remain a fool forever.

Ardisleeplessness

2009-10-20T04:59:00.002-05:00

I hate it when I procrastinate and end up having to pull an all nighter over an assignment that's dumb and not even all that hard. You'd think I'd have learned by now to always get things done ahead of time! I guess I should be glad at least that now I at least get it done in time, regardless of exactly how much sleep I loose in the process.

Forecast

2009-10-18T22:08:00.002-05:00

I went dragging Benny around campus today; I love these cold fronts moving though. They never last long, but they are heavenly none the less. They remind me that I want to move northward. Ahhh, I can't wait until I'm away from Texas heat...

Nature Lover

2009-10-16T22:06:00.002-05:00

This morning was beautiful. It was the kind of day that made me happy to be outside and walking around. I went up to a tree and just wanted to hug it, strongly embrace it in my arms! But that would have been slightly embarrassing with everyone watching. Instead I leaned by it, opening up a channel of mutual support. The tree supported me just as I supported it and we gazed blissfully together into the cold gentle wind. Then unable to restrain myself I reached a little lower. I don't think there's anything too weird about grabbing a tree.

Grim Fish

2009-10-12T23:45:00.000-05:00

I gave Grim a burial at pond today in near by John Crompton Park. He died of an infection that started in his left eye, but eventually began spreading elsewhere. I remember I got him my second day back at TAMUG for my sophomore fall semester; I bought him at Walmart and when I brought him home to his 10 gallon tank and turned on the light he sank right to the bottom and leaned against the glass mortified. I was sure he was going to die the first couple of days I had him, which lead me to naming him Grim. He slowly over the course of the week (mostly during which his tank light was kept off) he got more active and lively. It wasn't long before he grew to needing a larger tank. When I did my awesome semester of Calculus I where I got an A after getting Ds in PreCal and the first time I took Cal 1, he floated around his tank on my desk and intently watched me do homework. Oscar fish are always said to be somewhat smarter than other fish and are renowned for having personalities; I don't know about fish intelligence, but Grim definitely had personality. I had to move him home once and he jumped out of the tank while I was changing water. I scooped him up off the floor to put him back in the tank and he bit me with his big boney, toothless fish jaws. He never tried to jump out of the tank ever again. After I left Galveston I moved him to College Station, first in an apartment, then we lived alone for a while, then we moved through another apartment before settling in the current one. He got so big that fish nets and bags were no longer possible modes of transportation, I had to carry him in a bucket. I took a lot of pride in how large and healthy Grim grew up to be, so it was really difficult for me when he got sick because of me and slowly but surely died over the course of 2 weeks. Some days he looked so much better and some days he looked so much worse. All together he lived a good 5 years and I'd like to think that most of the time he was a happy fish. The apartment feels a lot more lonely without him.

You're Wrong, But You're Right.

2009-10-11T23:31:00.003-05:00

I've always looked up to my parents in a lot of ways. It took me leaving home to compare how strong they are to a lot of other people. I'm grateful of the one definite thing they managed to give me: a wide base of love and worth. That very thing has made some things hard these past two years. They might be outstanding, exceptional people, but they aren't perfect. They were wrong about a lot of things. And even then they were at least partially right about some of the things they were wrong on. I'm not sure exactly how I can have some conversations with them, but on some level knowing they love me trumps the need to even have them in the first place. Love and living are tricky like that.

March on to Your Crazy Tune

2009-10-08T21:56:00.002-05:00

I can't speak for anyone else, but for me there always seems to be a divide between the individual (me) and the society. I'm not talking about ideals. Ideals are by their definition are unrealistic; they're perfect. I'm talking about the actual expectations, actions, feelings of culture, all those things and more rolled into one. A lot of them are created by majorities (even majorities of minorities) and I'd be lying if there wasn't a very distinct stark line between what that culture expects before it offers rewards of success and what I'm willing to give it. I imagine this type of thing is generic enough to be applied to a lot of people and situations. It doesn't answer really answer those feelings though. No one really wants to be an outsider, but if compromising to fit to society is impossible, then you have to find your own stride. That's a message that's as old as children's stories but something that a lot of so called adults forget: March on... to your own crazy tune.

Chi Chi Chi Chia!

2009-10-06T20:15:00.001-05:00

I've decisively given up on shaving since the past week. With what little testosterone I have pumping I've managed to puff out an extremely irritating misshapen fuzz. I don't have to tell you it looks terrible. You can probably just imagine and that'll get you halfway there. But the good thing about looking terrible up front is that you don't have to worry too much about much else. Something that pretty much repels any kind of social interaction leaves me comfortably reserved. Plus I like to think of it kind of like a ChiaPet, the hedgehog one (because the head shaped one was stupid), only I don't have to water it, trim it, or leave it out in the sun. I pretty much just scratch and run my fingers along my chin stubble thoughtfully. Yeah, that's the stuff.

Measureablely Learned

2009-10-05T20:04:00.000-05:00

I took my first English exam today. I think I did okay with the exception of a fill in the blank section. Our professor, one of the most energetic and engaging professors I think I may have ever had, put a fill in the blank section on our exam because she felt it required students to actually have the tested information in their brains completely with full comprehension. Multiple choice questions only tested recognition, not cognition, and our class period isn't even an hour, making it far too short to have essays that aren't incomprehensible paper-vomit.

I agree with her that multiple choice questions only scratch the surface of actual comprehension. In a way, I'm always a little sad when professors rely on them so much for so called 'higher learning'. But at the same time I think fill in the blank questions are pretty bunky too. I lost somewhere between 16 and 20 points on questions that I feel like I comprehended everything but the verbatim word blurped out of the sentence. I don't like it. And then again at the same time, I can't think of any real way I could test students if I was a teacher, that would guarantee that they were comprehending and capable of using anything I was testing them on... forget only having 50 minutes to do it in. I would hope that teachers get studies and whatnot on what people say is the most effective... if I had to teach this conundrum would drive me bonkers.

Moose Eye View

2009-10-04T23:44:00.000-05:00

When you were a kid, did you ever make your own TV or radio stations? Make line ups? Etc.. etc... well I can tell you that was an act of pure boredom. I find myself in immense boredom, so I made something almost as well thought out: another blog. Check out LeafWheels on Blogger; I plan on updating it once or twice a day with random internet things. Don't expect too much effort or originality, and definitely don't expect any analysis.

A birds eye view gives you the scope of everything, it puts things in perspective. The opposite could be a mouse's eye view giving you insight to the gritty workings under the floor and between the walls. This new blog is neither of those things.

Intermittent with the randomness, I'm adding several internet series. While technically you can jump ahead by following the web sites, that's boring and you're likely to watch most of it all at once in an unappreciative marathon. Save yourself from yourself!

The A&M Water Polo Game

2009-10-03T18:44:00.000-05:00

I went to a water polo game today! A&M hosted a club tournament. They competed their team against other schools' teams most of today continuing through tomorrow. It's been 4 years since I played and probably 3 years since I even watched a game, so I was surprised at how much I instantly got into the game. Everything, terms, lingo, strategy, experiences, all came rushing back during the first quarter. I wish there were more water polo games around to watch. I kind of want to play some again, although I'm still so hopelessly out of shape. It's something to work towards though. =)

In terms of the game itself, things were pretty one-sided. The game was A&M's team vs. UT's B team. I forget the exact score, but A&M had a 15 point lead which constitutes one count of rape. I think if I ever have kids in sports, I'm going to be an annoying parent to deal with. I kept wanting to tell them 'tighten up', 'drive!', 'someone cut to the side and give the goalie someone to pass to!' Yeah, I'm probably going to be that asshole...

Getting Well Soon

2009-10-02T12:19:00.000-05:00

My animals don't like me much these days. Grim has an infection, so I'm changing out his tank water and trying to get him to eat. He doesn't care for most things though. I can't blame him, his right eye looks like hell.
For some reason the flea bombing failed more than usual. Right after we got back we were still finding fleas in the carpet. I'm hoping those are just chance hatchers. I'm trying to crack down on them, I gave Trolly and Norman their first bath a few days ago. They hated it, it was the most pitiful thing you could imagine. Trolly was too small to get out of the tub, so she just stood in the water sudds up and shaking with this expresion that said 'Dear god, why are you doing this to me?!" Norman is big enough to jump out once he gets his front claws latched on the edge, so I had to push his feet back when he started scratching up the side. He's a little more simple, it was more of 'Okay, I want to get out... Okay, I want to get out... Okay, I" over and over again. I felt terrible but then I saw little flea specks drifting off of them and going down the drain. At least it largely worked. I've been monkey-grooming them for fleas every day since. They don't like being held down or the flea comb. Trolly is now terrified of me picking her up. I think Norman's too dumb to remember anything past 30 seconds, so at least he still loves me.

Bascially, I'm a terrible pet owner in general at the momment.

More Fleas

2009-09-29T22:02:00.000-05:00

Somehow the fleas were able to break through the seal we put on the door to Tracy's hallway. They're back in full force! We're going to flea bomb the apartment tomorrow night. It's been decided that Tracy's room gets it's own flea bomb this time. While they're all over the apartment, they haven't reinfected the ferrets yet. I'm grateful for that!

Wanna Go Clubbing?

2009-09-28T22:11:00.000-05:00

School has definitely come down to a rhythm. In fact, it's gotten a little boring. Everyone seems to be having a busy semester, so it's been hard to link up with friends. And now that I'm pretty much over my sickness, I'm feeling fat, lazy, and inactive. I was planning for this semester to be so much more... something.

To rectify this problem, I've decided to join a school club! Now I don't know if I even can, but I'd like to get into some sort of athletic thing. Something where I could meet new people, burn off energy, and level off some of my near limitless ADD-interest. The downside to joining anything athletic is obvious: I'm not very athletic. In fact I tend to range somewhere between mediocre and flat out BAD at most sports (nix that, most things). I went on the A&M interwebs to try to find a sport club that I might be able to get into. Running is something I really enjoy, but really I'd like something a little bit more full body. Judo was something I tried a little bit of before, but I tried getting into it in two different semesters and both times I fell out of it; I'm just not a fighter. The only things that have caught my eye is the Triathlon Club and the Water Polo Club.

The more I think about it, the more I like the idea of getting back into water polo. I kind of miss that, even if I was terrible, and A&M's team probably out classes me. I could probably be happy trying Triathlon Club too though. The thing I'm worried about, water polo has already done tryouts and started practices; I haven't even swam in over a month... and before that one time it was well over 4 or 5 months! I know I'm crazy out of shape, I don't even think I could keep up at one practice as it stands and people sitting out of practices are always bad for the team as a whole. I can think of tons of advantages for me if I got on the team, I just can't think of too many they would have for having me on. <8|:o)

Sleeping Ferrets

2009-09-27T13:44:00.001-05:00

Ferrets are cute together because they sleep all the time and, to each other, friends are pillows and blankets!
Apply that rule to people and it gets creepy though...

Freakonomics

2009-09-26T18:47:00.000-05:00

Freakonomics! A book that my friend Travis bought me for my birthday ( or was it xmas?) several years ago (maybe even back in the Galveston age). I picked it up again recently and started reading it. I assure you it had nothing to do with the declicious looking fruit on the cover. An apple (yum) with the innards of an orange (yum!). I can only imagine what a citrus apple would taste like (heaven!), but as for the book itself, I'm impressed. It reads like a casual lecture, relating cause, effect, and correlation.

I can understand why some introductory economic classes have it for required reading! Unlike the required reading for my Physical Anthropology class, Freakonomics is not a excruciatingly detailed decade long study on the various habits of the spectral tarsier and its environment. It doesn't have graphs, charts, or even a full-fledged explanation of what exactly doing a 'regression' entails. Instead it focused conveying more applicable generalized principles through magnetic good humor; what it does have is a light hearted, if slightly cynical, theories that try to reveal the flaws in conventional-moral thinking. Towards the end, it seemed like every time I opened the book, I was disappointed to find my bookmark so close to the back cover. That doesn't happen often!

More of an exercise of thought than a serious book on how economics works, I'd recommend it to friends as a very entertaining read. The theme of the book: if morality is how we want the world to work, then economics is how the world really works.

(in the above blog I meant no disrespect the the fine required book, The Spectral Tarsier, written by my esteemed Physical Anthropology professor, Dr. Gursky. I find myself riveted by the various graphs, charts, and the full-fledged explanation of all your extensive and thorough tarsier observation and experiment methodologies, data, and clearly entailed conclusions! Truly an impressive collection of information about the often misunderstood tarsier. It's impressive girth and tiny print prevents me experiencing that disappointment outlined above, where I find myself gazing regretfully when I find my wondering 'is the book really going to end already?)

Dream Boats

2009-09-23T23:30:00.000-05:00

I had I crazy dream last night. I was part of a crew on a boat and we traveled down this long winding jungle river. Every so often we'd come to various abandoned water parks and dock in huge lagoons around water slides. Then we all had to split up because one of the people in the crew was a douche bag, so then we all had our own little groups. I had my own boat and was on my own for a long while. There was a nice guy I kept running into at the water slide lagoons who was traveling by hot air balloon. He was helpful, but every time I saw him I got scared that he was with the douche bags and ended up shooting him with something (oops). He was always okay though and never held it against me. At the end of the river was a huge Sea World water park and there were more douche bags catching everyone (we were too late!). They had an Apple system for their main computer, so I easily found the control panel icon, found my own user preferences, and set my colors to clear. That apparently worked somehow. If that doesn't make sense, all you need to know is that it made me invisible. I ended up being the only one of the good guys not caught, so I was running around invisible trying to find everyone else and get them freed. Unfortunately I was sick in my dream, and they tuned their dolphin tracking system to the sound of my sniffles. Just like most things in life, a really cool premise ended up getting ridiculous. I got annoyed when it wasn't fair and work up. I wish there was a way to stop it halfway.

The Ever Dominant Bean

2009-09-22T19:06:00.000-05:00

I went to my Anthro lab today. We're still doing heredity and alleles. I thought it was funny that we using little colored kidney beans as props, like we were all back in elementary school, grouping random pairs of red and white beans as alleles for 'people' and then eliminating the ones from the gene pool when natural selections or a random catastrophe deemed them fatal. It just goes to show you that you're never too old to play with counting beans.

Rain Waters the Flowers to Grow in Sunshine.

2009-09-20T09:47:00.000-05:00

Ever have a mantra? I'm not scoping this towards religious chanting, but some little insightful saying that becomes something to live by. People compile books of those little warm and fuzzy blurbs. I don't think reading said books really does anything for anyone. It might provide a little pick-me-up, but it's too short lived or impacting to be a transformation. That's because mantras are journeys of personal exploration, where you learn about you in particular and how your actions impact the world around you. By analyzing yourself, where you are, and where you'd like to be in the perspective of self awareness, THAT is how you transform your life.

"If you wait for the whole apartment to smell like poop before you empty the litter box, the smell tends to linger something awful." Yeah, that's what I try to live my life by. Just sounds like something that needs to be engraved on a memorial somewhere.

Hanoko 002 ~ Kritins and the Forest

2009-09-19T15:26:00.000-05:00

I fixed up the second one!

Forever...

2009-09-18T20:07:00.000-05:00

We finished our discussion Judy Blume's book, Forever..., in my adolescent literature class. For those of you who haven't read it, it's basically porn for tween girls. Perfect families, practical sex talk, she names her boyfriend's penis Ralph (the name comes up surprisingly often). I don't consider myself a prude, but I can't decide if I'd let my teenage daughter read books like this. On one hand, I guess it's informative and empowering. On the other hand, it is pretty sexual.

Scammers Need to Speak Better English (for sexual purposes)

2009-09-17T12:05:00.001-05:00

One of my roommate's friends had his facebook account hacked. A scammer came on and tried to get him to wire money. I was nearby and grabbed the computer. Hilarity ensued. Be warned, we get a little GRAPHIC. Reader discretion is advised.

Michael
11:27
hey
11:27Michael went idle

SupremeThor
11:27
hey!
what are you up to?
11:28Michael became active

Michael
11:28
i'm in some kind of deep shit right now

SupremeThor
11:28
oh?

Michael
11:29
I'm stranded in london

SupremeThor
11:29
whaaaa?
how did *that* happen?

Michael
11:29
got mugged at gun point last night
all cash,credit card and phone was stolen

SupremeThor
11:30
what were you doing in london...?

Michael
11:30
I had a trip for summer
It was a Brutal Experience,but thank God i still have my life and passport saved

SupremeThor
11:32
well, there's that

Michael
11:33
my return flight leaves in few hours but having troubles sorting out the hotel bills

SupremeThor
11:34
well that sucks, you might be late for class
*I take over for Justin*
well are you going to be okay?

Michael
11:36
wondering if you could loan me some few $$ to sort out the hotel bills and also take a cab to the airport

SupremeThor
11:37
hmmm, about how much?

Michael
11:37
I will pay you back the cash immediately i get back home
it just 600$

SupremeThor
11:38
that's cool, but you have to pay it right back

Michael
11:39
since i still have my international passport with me
i can use that as identification as soon as you send the money to me
through western union

SupremeThor
11:39
don't you have paypal?

Michael
11:39
dont hav much init
that why i contact you for the help
because I know i can count on you

SupremeThor
11:41
what are friends for?
anyway, we go way back
western union?

Michael
11:42
yea
All you have to do is to have it send through western union
to my information

SupremeThor
11:44
okay, I'm pulling it upnow
I'venever used this before
this is weird huh?

Michael
11:44
ok
it very simple

SupremeThor
11:44
I'm kind of glad you called I was thinking about you the other day

Michael
11:44
You can visit there website for instant transfer within a second transfer on www.westernunion.com

SupremeThor
11:45
yeah I'm on the site right now

Michael
11:45
ok
just click on send money
you will find it in the website

SupremeThor
11:45
did you ever break up with that girl?
oh i have to make a new account

Michael
11:47
ok

SupremeThor
11:47
but anyways, are you single again?

Michael
11:48
am not sure that is necessary
am not sure that is necessary
all you have to do is to use your credit cards

SupremeThor
11:48
i miss the way you smelled

Michael
11:48
you dont need any acc again

SupremeThor
11:50
it keeps tellingme to make one
do you ever think about that night?

Michael
11:50
hmmm
yea
but please i really need the cash
we will talks about this as soon as am back
ok
so are you still on the website
?

SupremeThor
11:53
noone has ever made love to me like that

Michael
11:54
hmm
ye
yea*

SupremeThor
11:54
the way you were just on your back

Michael
11:54
try and creat an acc and do the transfer

SupremeThor
11:54
with me thrusting into you

Michael
11:54
ok?

SupremeThor
11:55
don't you care about us?!

Michael
11:55
I do
and you know that
but i need your help nw
you are not showing me any concern
why?

SupremeThor
11:56
oh I'm gonna help you so hard
we need to get your hot ass back home!
okay I'mon it
okay, did it go through?

Michael
11:58
hey, this is really me now

SupremeThor
11:58
ooooh

Michael
11:58
no money needed

SupremeThor
11:58
things were just getting interesting!
lol

Michael
11:59
lol ya i can see

SupremeThor
11:59
we were cybering with your nigerian friend o.0
anyway...

Michael
11:59
i have a nigerian friend

SupremeThor
11:59
don't click on bad links

Michael
11:59
?

SupremeThor
11:59
well, whoever hyjacked your account
my roommate was having too much fun with it all!
although i'm glad you didn't really get mugged in london

Michael
12:00
me too

SupremeThor
12:01
anyway
i'm going to go find lunch!

Michael
12:01
thanks for the heads up justin

Ice Skating

2009-09-10T22:30:00.000-05:00

I took some time off from the massive amount of studying I'm trying to pull off and went ice skating again tonight. That makes 3 times in 3 weeks so far. After the initial improvement bloom on my first time I'm still pretty slow and a weak skater. You'd think that running all the time would give me a boon in skating... and you'd be wrong. Last week I noticed that my ankles sink inwards and that causes my blades to meet the ice weird. This week I busted out my foot arch support and shoved it in my boot. It definitely help, but didn't fix the problem my far. I think it has to do a lot with how I rest myself on my ankles, I naturally just relax them inwardly instead of standing on top. I've decide to spend this next 7 days trying to walk on top of my foot instead on the inside. I'm hoping it'll build up more support.

Hanoko 001 ~ Cantankerous Mello

2009-08-30T12:14:00.001-05:00

I went back and fixed the first video with my cartoon. I'm busy running around today, so I'll just post it here. I am not lazy!

Ice Skating

2009-08-28T20:22:00.000-05:00

I don't think I've been ice skating since I was 5 years old. It's just something that's never interested me and I don't remember ever really having much fun. I never liked falling down on my butt when I was a kid and I would have rather have been somewhere warm. Plus there's no snow in ice skating. Mainly I just remember being stuck in uncomfortable shoes, hanging onto the wall, and scratching up ice crystals to make snowballs with... oh I remember that being hilarious.

Anyway, after listening to the new Owl City CD nonstop for about two weeks (half of the songs of which seem to do with icy things or explicitly ice skating) I decided that I wanted to go again. And so I got a whole new perspective on the sport. A mature adult perspective if I might so bold.

Ice skating has a lot of going in circles. I never processed that as a child. If almost anything but ice was out there, it'd look like the most boring, dumb activity ever. If it was just regular ground, and everyone went there to walk around in circles on it while music played, occasionally changing direction (oh how exciting) or watching as some extremely skilled walker went break dance spinning in the middle.. if that was the case, it'd be dumb as hell. Even something like a swimming pool does seem to fit. Ice skating rinks and how people act in them is unique because if it didn't involve ice, the Texan's worst enemy, no-one would see the point in it. But since it is Ice filling the rink, people find it acceptable to mill around in circles while a radio scratches in the background. Why? Because trying to move on ice is like juggle huge water balloons and trying to learn spanish.

I learned a valuable lesson trying to ice skate again: sometimes doing mundane and boring things is interesting when you put a handicap on it. I'm hoping my legs get stronger for next week, apparently its 2 for 1 on Thursdays and the price is already pretty cheap. Go figure.

Here's to falling! John

Lil John Wears Worlds Biggest Name Tag

2009-08-24T14:12:00.000-05:00

I heard a rumor today that Lil John had been selected to be awarded the newly coined Jackson Prize for his vast and immeasurable contributions to the art of music. And even though I may have just made that up, I think we'd all have to agree that it would be the right thing to do! Lil John is an irreplaceable national treasure. An influence on my life, showing that turrets syndrome and a smoking problem can single handily save an absurd number of songs that tragically mixed a catchy beat with lyrics that induce my dry heave response. Just when I almost comprehend what the song is talking about I find myself wondering 'what who the hell was that?' If you don't remember 'from the windows to the walls', fret not, we now have this little gem:

Patron Tequila by Paradiso Girls
(if the video stops working use this: Click Here )

As a note on the music video, I have to say that I'm disappointed. For a song sexing up alcohol poisoning and smoking weed I thought it'd have more of... you know... alcohol and weed. Instead I'm left confused and the sense I just watched a Best Buy commercial. For a song so perfectly, vividly explicit I have to wonder why they abstracted it to a wallflower sitting in a lively, bright eyed club scene. I guess this means there really is no way to make vomit smexy. Hear the bulimics? This is calling you out.

Drinking Game: take a drink whenever the guy looks like he's having a Lorelle moment OR when Lil John says anything that's not "Lets Go!", "Hey!", "What's Happening?", "Come On!", "Say What?", "Uhuh", "Hey Gurl!", or something that isn't already being sung by someone else.

Lake

2009-08-24T00:01:00.000-05:00

Went to Canyon Lake today with my dad. We haven't always had a lot in common or even gotten along, but some of my fondest memories with the man are on that lake. I had almost forgotten it until I got out there, the time we went night fishing in 'Canyon Cove' with LED bobbers, Rudy's BBQ, and a small propane stove I made hot chocolate on. I have no idea how old I was at the time somewhere between 5 and 13?

Fleas!!

2009-08-22T21:48:00.000-05:00

The battle has begun! Fleas have found my beloved ferrets and so WAR IS DECLARED. Unfortunately, ferrets are small creatures with sensitive systems, making even a mild infestation harmful. Also they have thick hardy coats which are dense and hard to comb through. They also simply can't be made to sit still once they're awake. Finally to top it all off, their coat needs to be kept comfortably oily, so bathing them is a big no-no.

So if there aren't medications made for them that get rid of fleas, and I can't use conventional flea baths, how the hell am I supposed to de-flea them?! Apparently lemons. You can infer from how this entry is phrased that I'm almost expecting this not to work, but the internet says to boil 1 lemon for about a day in a gallon of water and then to soak the lemon-water into my ferret's fur. I complied as best I could and employed the all powerful Borax to de-flea other unlaundrable surfaces in the apartment. I'm going to try this for a week and see if it reduces flea encounters, reporting back to you, loyal readers (I think there's maybe 2 and a half people who skim over this occasionally).

District 9

2009-08-16T17:03:00.000-05:00

District 9 is a movie that SciFi enthusiasts will nerd-gasm over for years to come. Anyone with a background of liking the genere will find this movie extremely entertaining. It has a loose plot premise that isn't thoroughly explained in the movie, but then again, the movie doesn't focus on trying to explain things. Basically in the beginning of the movie, it's established that an alien space craft mysteriously stopped over an African city, seemingly broke down, and the aliens residing in it are stranded on earth. Insect like creatures are given a small sanctuary of their own which develops into a full-on African slum.

Not to be mistaken with other alien involved movies that fall outside of traditional Science Fiction (Transformers), District 9 focuses it's themes on abstracting human nature and transposing it over the extraordinary in an attempt to represent it with a cognitive twist. District 9 gives us two races interacting and the tensions that come from their differences. The actual plot isn't too bad, although the premise itself is the main goal of this movie.

I give District 9 4 out of 5 movie ferrets for being different than most movies cranked out every year... and for being successful at it.

Tracy Gone T_T

2009-08-16T08:00:00.000-05:00

It's weird how empty my apartment feels these days. Tracy almost completely moved out last night and now there's no one around to bug me when I get up. Now I have to travel outside and find people to bug me. It's really inconvenient, not to mention impractical. There's still a couple of piles of 'Tracy Things' so at least I assure myself that she has to come back at some point. Come back Tracy and move the rest of your crap!

Movie Review: Funny People

2009-08-11T18:36:00.000-05:00

I saw this movie twice, once with my family and then again when I tagged along with some friends. I enjoyed the second viewing much more just because I prepared myself not to watch something laugh out loud funny.

Adam Sandler and Seth Rogen star with other stand-up comedians in a pitch-black dark comedy. Despite the title of the movie and the fact that it follows five separate stand-up comedians, I had trouble recognizing this movie as a comedy. A main theme of the movie: comedians, employed to be funny, lead unhappy lives, is reflected differently, though consistently, through each character. As can be expected, there's a heaping helping of actual stand-up routines in this movie. It helps break up the action, which in all honesty gets to be a little depressing around the middle of the movie. Adam Sandler plays an angry comedic legend, which meshes well against Seth Rogan (who is marketed as not funny) showing his classic 'confused puppy' expressions.

Once I reconciled myself that this was not a movie about comedians that would make me ROFLMAO movie, I throughly enjoyed the dark situational humor, the various stand-up routines, and the well developed plot of the movie. That's why I give this 3.75 out of 5 Movie Ferrets!

Movie Review: Julie & Julia

2009-08-09T20:13:00.000-05:00

Julie & Julia is movie that follows a woman, Julie, who finds herself unsatisfied with her life and seeks a journey of self discovery by cooking her way through the cook book of her cooking idol, Julia. Julia decides to document it in a blog, cooking every one of Julia's 500+ recipes in the span of one year. The movie parallels the two characters, showing Julia's early cooking career alongside Julie's year long endeavor. While enjoyable, I would say that this movie is largely a mediocre with the saving grace of Meryl Streep playing Julia Childs. It has funny moments, some memorable lines, but the overall product (though by no fault of Amy Adams or Chris Messina) is pretty forgettable.

The plot line the movie seems to try to focus on Julie cook/blogging her way through Julia's recipies, never seems to escalate it's conflict beyond the same baseline of angst. Challenges arise, but are quickly answered and forgotten; it gets a little redundant and the end of the movie more or less happens without any real palpable climax. As mentioned before, Meryl Streep (and for that matter, also her opposite Stanley Tucci) does an amazing job in her role. Playing the always upbeat, although socially quirky, Julia Childs she became the sole factor that propelled my interest in this movie. The chemistry between her character and Stanley Tucci's character is endearing and becomes the only reason to watch this movie. I wish the movie had focused more on her and used Julie as more of a framing device than a paralell plot line.

Even if half of the movie is basically forgettable and dragging, the Julia Childs plot line saves it and gets this movie 3 out of 5 movie ferrets!

The World Under Boredom

2009-08-08T13:05:00.000-05:00

Out of school and working part time has given me free time. Dare I say too much free time? I will say that I have been making weekly trips home to see family. Very recently I also managed to see most of the old high school friends I still talk to. I’ve met a few completely new people over the past few weeks and even managed begin to reacquaint with other people I briefly knew in passing (with the social grace of a caveman clubbing a mate to drag back to his cave, but what can you do?). The point is that I haven’t had a real ‘job’ occupying my time and that has lead to the dangerous pass time of thinking.

I don’t know where I’ll be in 10 or 20 years from now. I can’t even fathom what I’ll be doing when I’m 50… 60… 200 years old (I’ll never die, thank you modern medicine!) In a weird sort of mental MTV reality show, I get this weird comforting fantasy that once everything settles, I’ll move into a big house and I’ll share it with everyone I’ve ever met in my life. We’ll talk about old times and on the occasional down time from our jobs we’ll go out and do and see things. No one will get eliminated or voted off, although we’ll probably fight over who’s not doing the dishes (it’ll be me). More or less though we’ll get along and understand each other. Maybe that’s the weird sense of security I get from thinking about it. Maybe that’s what heaven’s like. Maybe if the house is big enough you could say that’s what the world is like. Maybe you could say that today’s world is a kind of heaven. Okay, now I'm scarring myself. I’m going to go for a run and go back to cleaning out my car.

Electric Boogaloo

2009-07-29T12:36:00.000-05:00

Last night was weird. My roommate is in the process of moving out, some time around 5:00 am she was using my vacuum cleaner and grabbed a spot on the cord where the rubber has somehow been removed and managed to electrocute her arm. Luckily, as of this morning it hasn't turned black and fallen off yet, but electrical burns arc inside the body, so really they're hard to gauge. From what we can see though, the blistering looks somewhat minor and roommate is following all the post electrocution protocol: ice, ointments, not touching the vacuum anymore...

Now I need to figure out how I'm going to patch up the cord on my brand new vacuum. T_T

Swimming?

2009-07-28T20:00:00.000-05:00

I spent a good portion of yesterday looking for a drag suit. Apparently functional swimming attire is a rare occurrence. Don't fret though, to compensate there was plenty of board shorts and poorly designed trunks. Even Academy (Sports and Outdoors) failed me, corralling all male and female swimwear to a back corner and making way of a menagerie of colorful Nike running shorts. I don't know how people got swimming shit before the internet!

Another New Residence

2009-07-26T17:26:00.000-05:00

Resident Evil fans who found themselves confused with the mishappened mess of discontinuity and unresolved plot-bunnies are in for a questionable gift: a fourth installment to the series. For those who have never seen any of the movies, the first one, written and directed by Paul Anderson (Mr. Video Game to Movie extraordinare) is a decent suspense movie with a zombie twist. The second and third one, written by Anderson but directed by seemingly less capable people while he pursued important projects such as Alien Vs Predator (don't see it!), got progressively TERRIBLE and should only be watched under extreme duress or in a vain attempt to understand horrible renditions of the video game characters. In spite of it all my complaining I can't lie; I'm going to see the movie. Anderson is directing this one, so I can tell myself that it has a hope to be managed in a way that doesn't feel like the direction is fighting with the script (case in point: Resident Evil 3: Extinction, the movie has some good themes and sequences, but it carelessly lingers on parts that aren't pertinent or that just seem completely random; I felt that presentation choices were trying to redefine focus points in the movie, and that lead it to feel long and awkward).

Even if Anderson wasn't directing it though and it was absolutely garenteed to be terrible, I'd probably still go see it in theaters just to see how they were moving the material from the game source around this time. And that is why sequels are inherently [resident] EVIILL.

Sad Good Day

2009-07-23T23:24:00.000-05:00

Every now and then people enter your life who, while not perfect, are still strong individuals who exemplify love, experience, and determination. Of course these kinds of people will never stay in your life as much as you'd like, but what you have to remember is that you're lucky to have ever known them at all.

Moms

2009-07-11T22:41:00.000-05:00

My statistics grade came out and it was a full letter grade above what I was expecting, so I made it a point to call my mom today. She did that lovingly chastising that only a mom can do: "You're so smart, you can pick stuff up quickly and skate by without trying. But you too stubborn and don't have the tenacity to reach your full potential." I've been in college long enough to know just how not smart I am, but I will admit to being lazy. Some have even said flaky. That's something I can take to heart and work on.

Magic: Running Games and Power Creep

2009-07-11T20:15:00.000-05:00

This article is part of the series: Magic: The Gathering Summer '09

Magic the Gathering is an old card game, created in 1993. It was the original collectible card game, and as you can expect, it's earliest incarnation had some definite limitations. The fact that it's lasted this long (over 15 years) can not be attributed to a sturdy game design. Instead, I think it's endurance has more to do with capable management and handling with a deep rooted vein in conceptualizing popular themes in fantasy. The huge great sweeping M10 rules change was an attempt to prevent complexity creep. But more routine management is needed for maintain a game as a business. Running games, that is that games that are routinely updated and sold in waves, almost inevitably have one sweeping problem: Power Creep.

As a business, the main goals is to stay in business. When creating a game, the main goal is to make an enjoyable experience for the players. If no one buys your product, your business fails and if you fail to make the experience enjoyable, people won't play your game. But if you have a running game, you have to release game parts that are compatible with older iterations and still give people incentive to buy them. One way to do this, a very easy way, is to release cards that are strictly better than previous ones. (In the card world) this creates a situation where although older cards technically work, anyone who fails to buy your newest release will be at a distinct disadvantage. The release of strictly better cards with each iteration is Power Creep, as the power level of the cards released steadily raises in an effort to attract players to buy newer cards.

Power Creep is seductive in that it literally gives most players what they want, stronger and cheaper cards. But it is destructive to the fun game play over the long run. As cards get cheaper in their playing cost, the individual matches get shorter and more explosive. Players often want cards that decrease the variability of their shuffled deck, but releasing too many cards that allow them search for cards leads to matches that are no longer randomized and that are overly predictable. Most often, whatever players want most is bad for the game overall because players think strictly of ways they can card-for-card improve their play.

While the cards used in most recent Magic sets are stronger than the majority of early sets, they have done a decent job of avoiding Power Creep. They largely accomplished this by by doing two things: setting baseline 'standards' and rotating themes. The core sets, are often the place where 'standards' cards are released. An example is the Grizzly Bears card, one that has been in core sets since the beginning. For for the cost of 1 colored mana and 1 mana of any color (listed at the top right of the card) you get a creature that has 2 attack points and 2 hit points. All other new cards that are similar are only allowed to be slightly better than Grizzly Bears. For instance Wild Mongrel is a card based off Grizzly Bears. It has the same cost and the same stats but it has an extra ability, an ability so good that it unexpectedly became a power house card to play on the second turn. Wild Mongrel is strictly better than Grizzly Bears, but it did not become the new standard. Many sets (and bear lookalikes later) Ashcoat Bear was released. Just like all other cards on the 'bear standard' it is meant to be only slightly better than the standardized Grizzly Bears. Magic does this with all basic creatures and all basic effects it deems central to the game.

Although releasing cards that continuously get better than the same base card prevents the game from getting Power Creep, by itself it doesn't encourage the sales of newer sets. Which is why Magic rotates themes. Each set and block (3 related sets) tie together by focusing on certain playing styles or concentrations on certain game zones. For instance, one of the reasons Wild Mongrel was so good was that it was released in a block that rewarded players for having many cards in their discard pile (graveyard). It also followed a block where players were rewarded for playing cards of multiple colors. Had Wild Mongrel been released in a a block based around artifact cards (such as Mirrodin) it wouldn't have been as exciting. Magic rotates these themes and markets them as a fun new way to play the game. It also uses the rotation to discontinue the cards from popular tournament play a few years after their introduction. This allows them to generate excitement by releasing cards strictly better than the standards (which most tournament players have) reissued in the core set.

One of the most drastic changes in this upcoming core set is the removal of the standard Wrath of God, a card that was so hyper efficient at mass creature removal that could not be improved upon without risking Power Creep. Every white colored tournament deck would often include the maximum number of Wrath of God cards over the newly released Wrath-variants because they were often more specific and more expensive to play cards than the standard. Wrath of God has been so strongly ingrained in core sets that it's often been seen as one of the few reasons to actually buy core set cards. In its place, they put what would otherwise be seen as a new Wrath-variant.

Magic: M10 Rules Changes

2009-07-10T20:15:00.001-05:00

This article is part of the series: Magic: The Gathering Summer '09

Magic is a card game that has kept many of its essentials much the same despite pioneering the collectible card game as a business and surviving over 15 years. However as it's progressed it has found itself burdened with its attempts incorporate fantasy, fun, and comprehensive game mechanics. Magic started out as side game people could play with cards while waiting at Dungeons & Dragons gatherings, as it grew and developed into its own right it became distinctly different. While D&D is a story telling game, Magic has grown into a contest game. Magic boasts strict rules that can run through competitions and tournaments. These rules weren't perfected at the start and eventually the number of special cases and the strain of several stacked effects created situations where even judges and experts had to subjectively guess at what was going to happen in the outcome. In an effort to make the rules more coherent, Magic got a huge overhaul with the release of it's 6th edition core set, the summary of all past card accepted in the standard playing environment. For whatever reason, on the cusp of what would be the 11th edition core set, the power at work decided to do something similar. For starters, the core sets now are planned to be released by year, hence the title M10 for Magic Core Set 2010. There are six main changes to the rules and one policy change. Below Im' going to describe them and their impact.

#1 Now Mulligans are simultaneous. That is, before the active player decided how many mulligans he or she wanted to do before the passive player. No one really cared about this rule as it was an effort to make the game overly mechanized. It was cumbersome and largely ignored by 99% of the people playing. This was a good call even though it doesn't really effect much.

#2 Manaburn no longer exists. Typically you tap lands for mana of the corresponding color, and that mana is used to pay for the cost of cards and abilities you want to play. Occasionally there are cards that add arbitrary amounts of mana to your pool and before, the player would take damage for each unused mana as it emptied from the mana pool at the end of each phase. This reduces the functionality of some cards but Manaburn was always such a small part of the game, that I think it's a change for the overall better.

#3 Lifelink and Deathtouch are no longer triggered effects. These were both abilities that triggered when creatures that have them deal damage. Lifelink makes the creature's controller gain that much life and deathtouch kills any other creature hit with the damage. While it made the abilities easier for rule-whores like me to piece together in my head, it did lead to some unintuitive situations. Like even though a lifelink creature deals damage, there was always a brief momment where the player could take lethal damage and loose. This was especially relevant during combat, where lifelink-life could have otherwise kept a player alive. This change will make me have to reorder how I do combat math, but it still is so intuitive that I believe it is a good change. In a related story, this also means that multiple instances of lifelink no longer trigger individually. Genju of the Fields is sad.

#4 Token Ownership is now the controller of the Token when it comes into play. Apparently before, Tokens were 'owned' by the controller of the card that made them, reguardless who controlled them when they came into play. I didn't even know about this rule, but it largely was a technicality. This just prevents Warp World, Azorius Æthermage, and Brand from doing weird things with cards that put tokens under your opponent's control. It makes sense, I like this too.

#5 Assign Combat Damage is now no longer a phase. Instead now creatures all deal their damage and die. Also during the Declare Blockers step, if multiple creatures block a single attacking creature, the attacking player orders the blocking creatures in a row. When damage is dealt, it more or less 'tramples' through the creatures. Once damage assigned to be lethal to the first creature to attacking player can (but is not forced to) run the rest to the next in line and so forth. This is a huge change for me and my tricksey combat math, although I see how it makes the combat step easier to understand. It took me by surprise at first. It definitely changes how I evaluate cards like Mogg Fanatic (who can no longer assign his attacking/blocking combat damage and then activate this ability to sacrifice himself and deal another damage to a creature to player). Cards like Morphling and Fleeting Image don't like this change much, but everyone else does. I understand and agree with it. As a side note, Deathtough now lets creatures spread out it's damage.

#6 Terminology: Battlefield, Exile, and At the Beginning of the End of Turn. This change only affects how cards are worded. Now when a card would say "When CARDNAME comes into play" it'll say "When CARDNAME enters the battlefield." Instead of "Remove target card in a graveyard", it's "Exhile target card in a graveyard". And finally, instead of "At end of turn, sacrifice CARDNAME" it's "At the beginning of the end step, sacrifice CARDNAME." These were all done because newer player apparently were getting confused with terminology 'play', 'removed from game', and the convoluted end of turn step. However with the exception of Exile, it's just replacing sloppy wording with more sloppy wording. 'Entering the Battlefield' hints at 'whenever this attacks' as much as it does 'when this comes into play'. Although it tries to be flavorful, it comes off as stupid and clumsy. A better approach would have been to phrase it as 'Enters the field of play'. Although space is always a consideration with wording, 'field of play' only has 2 more characters than Battlefield and is much more clean. Speaking of which 'At the beginning of the end of turn step' is clumsy as hell! This is supposed to clear up the confusion because 'At end of turn' was a phrase for a triggered ability going off at the end of turn step while 'until end of turn' was a phrase for a state-based. This only mattered when people tried tricks, using 'At end of turn, this goes away' effects during the end step of the turn... meaning the 'go away effect' wouldn't actually go away until the end of the next turn. This is sloppy because these tricks were unintuitive anyway. They should have just consolidated them both as state based effects: for example changing it to 'during the end of turn'. That would have been shorter, cleaner, and easier for newer players to grasp while sacrificing nothing in terms of intended functionality as no 'at end of turn' abilities are really directed to be played through this loophole. I loathe 'Battlefield' and 'Beginning of the end of turn' phrasing. I can agree to 'Exile' as 'removed from the game' has become a more interactive zone, it just doesn't mean what it used to so it needs a new name.

#7 More generalized creatures will now appear in the Core set along with functional reprints of cards from previous sets. This is a policy to make the core sets appealing to newer players. 'Real world' things are being removed along with 'Magic universe only' name references to make a more generic fantasy scene. While this does make things easier to understand, it also gives returning players a little bit of the shaft. Core sets are low selling points, but they set baselines and return cards that would be retiring to the Standard format for another rotation. Now players who obtain cards when they are originally released have to buy their functional reprints when they're put into the core set? I understand the policy, but it smacks of something bitter. I only hope Wizards of the Coast look forward enough to start naming cards intended for the core set names that won't require functional reprints. The good news is that all the real functional reprints I've seen so far have been common, so in the online environment they can be picked up for literally a few pennies each. Also some of the creature types have shifted a little bit, allowing them to tweak relevant creature types more into use (for instance Savannah Lions is now a Human Solider, something with more type support in White). This change actually does help me out, in Singleton (where 100 card decks are used with only 1 of each card), I am now effectively able have two Skyhunter Prowlers, Remove Souls, and Civic Wayfinders. I'm confused as to why they made Runeclaw Bears to replace Grizzly Bears when they already had made exact-down-to-the-creature-type, ready-to-go functional equivalents with Bear Cub and Forest Bear. But whatever.

These eterras are meant to take effect immediately (Gatherer has already been updated) in paper Magic, and will go onto Magic Online come July 29th.

Productivity

2009-07-10T08:15:00.000-05:00

With Statistics finally over, you would think I would jump directly into projects and work and make a good use of my time. You would think and it would be a fantasy. I'm not looking forward to retirement just because it means that I won't have a regular job to keep me purposefully moving on a normal schedule; heaven only knows what grumpy old man I'll be when I have nothing to do all day AND I have joint pain.

Magic: The Gathering Summer '09

2009-06-26T00:17:00.000-05:00

Magic: The Gathering is a collectable card game I've played off and since high school. In it, players that turns playing land and spell cards from their hand generated from their randomized deck. The decks themselves are assembled ahead of time from their owner's collection, making each one unique and customized around each player's style.

Magic is an old game compared to its competitors. It's the original collectable card game, owning the patient on all 'collectable card games where decks are shuffled to randomize the outcome' (paraphrased). Through its management and development I think there's a lot that can be discussed. It has come to exemplify the struggles in the general facets of a game and also as a business. I've slowly drifted away from the game in the past year or so, but recently its gone through a major rule update and released new products on the market. I've decided to update in the a miniseries over the next couple of days, referencing Magic.

Articles:
Magic 2010 Rules Change
Running Games and Power Creep
Card Value and Rarity
Balancing Flavor and Clarity in Logic Powered Games
THe Online Digital Card Game
Digital Rendering of Real-Life Logic Games
Magic: The Gathering, Duels of the Planeswalkers ~ Review

Education. This Helps Me?

2009-06-22T14:20:00.000-05:00

I'm very much looking forward to the classes leveled at me this upcoming Fall semester. The class I'm currently enrolled in is not only not interesting to me, but I spend a fair amount of time wondering 'why the hell do I care about this again'. I know I'm not alone. I've heard everyone and their mother complain in just that manner while attending classes. On level I understand that some classes aren't popular with the majority of people, but at the same time I realize that the reason certain classes aren't interesting is because I actually know that I will never use the information I'm being taught in the class ever again.

I might be the anomaly, because I've painstakingly staked out college with the intention that whatever the hell I graduate with, I will heavily rely on in my career. What the hell is the point in going to a reputable school like A&M if I'm going to graduate with a 'worldly understanding' about some crap that at best half relates to anything I ever do again. I'm not a education history type person, but I get the feeling that maybe this 'generic' class structure is the result of college education becoming so mainstream for everyone. I literally feel like I'm in a bigger high school sometimes in certain classes. I feel like I should eek by, make a passing grade, and then forget everything I ever heard or thought of in that class because I'll need that brain space for slightly more functional things, such as the miles I'm supposed to get my oil changed and fun trivia I hear off TV game shows.

I think it would be more constructive to make classes less broadly structured and more specialized. I don't really see the point in ever taking a statistics class, for instance, if I'm not a Math major. Even though I'm in Anthropology and therefore stand a good chance of someday using statistics in someway eventually, I feel like I would have to call up a statistical expert for guidance anyway, just to be sure. Going with the example of statistics, I think it would be more productive if they integrated several components from both statistics and anthropology into a class that focused exclusively on the issues pertinent to statistics in anthropological studies and experiments.

Curfew

2009-06-21T14:00:00.000-05:00

In spite of all the good intentions I have when I say 'well I want to go to bed earlier tonight', it never seems to happen. It's tiring to get back home at 3 or 4 am and then slowly wind down to go to sleep. And it's really annoying to end up sleeping in as a result. So I'm putting a 'be home at 11:00 pm' curfew alarm on my phone and 'be asleep by 12:00' on me until further notice. Obviously the nights I close Sweets are the exception.

Driver's Seat

2009-06-20T17:55:00.000-05:00

When I'm driving I'm always paranoid about hitting a pedestrian. I end up imagining that some small child or stupid person wearing all black at night is trying to get themselves run over and killed as part of some malicious scheme (I didn't say it was a smart malicious scheme).

The center of the conflict comes from a weird place though. I would just rather not kill anything I'm not going to eat.

Kitten Kettle

2009-06-19T11:39:00.000-05:00

Once again to break up the monotony. Patches Bristol McGee poses here in the evening. Tell her she looks radiant, seeing as how she's become touchy and insecure about being a huge, fat, pear shaped kitten in the prime of her teen years. We all need to be considerate of the adorable fat hoe's feelings.

By the way this entry can substitute in for a critical look at how modern society identifies and reacts to female teenage sexual activity. (Remember: spay and neuter your children, as the above critical look distantly equated children with pets).

At the 'Fire David Letterman' Rally

2009-06-18T11:48:00.000-05:00

At the 'Fire David Letterman' Rally is a short video posted onto the New York magazine website, credited to Jonah Green. The internet is a massive network, full of amusing clips featuring grown men getting racked in the balls and skateboarding dogs. However, At the 'Fire David Letterman' Rally manages to deliver a punch straight to the funny bone.

Following the wake of a misdirected joke in which Letterman said Palin's daughter was knocked up while attending a baseball game, obviously targeting Bristle Palin and unaware that she attended the game with her younger 14 year old daughter, Palin released an official statement full of her infamous political professionalism accented with a hint of the technological savviness that make her the wet dream of any conservative under the age of 28: she updated her Facebook page, oh and boy she has sass!! (on her Facebook page)

At the 'Fire David Letterman' Rally is the laugh out loud comedy of the year. What begins as a somewhat serious rally featuring angry and concerned people becomes a light hearted jest about how stupid people spend their free time. In the first 20 seconds, we are given the startling news that a issue of great importance is taking place. People hold signs saying 'Sex Offender' and condemning CBS. A woman informs the camera that EVERYONE IN THE COUNTRY IS VERY VERY FRUSTRATED AND UPSET. On my first watch I was amazed to find that yet another major national crisis had slipped past my radar. Following her, several other activists voice their concern. A woman with big glasses gives us context clues as what schmuck means in jewish, but the real punch line is when the college looking kid says he doesn't watch any TV other than Fox News. That line ends the set up and from here it's pure comedy!

What's the one thing more hilarious than two disagreeing people yelling at each other? Two people who agree yelling at each other! Big Glasses deafly yells her agreements at another supporter trying to yell at other people. He flickers between trying to ignore her and pausing to consider telling her to shut the hell up. What the fuck is that big oversized paper thing? You know what we need at more street rallies? Fine print.

The next item apparently discussed is Letterman's own family life. A much calmer voice tries to be decent; apparently he has a son out of wedlock. And apparently that means something here? The woman speaking as EVERYONE IN THE COUNTRY is back to inform us that really its a daughter; you can tell how in-tune she is with everyone in the country, its the only reason she was voted spokeswoman for the American public. I'm a little confused about whether Letterman has a son out of wedlock or a daughter (possibly both or a single child transitioning between genders, who the hell can tell with this crowd), but fortunately Big Glasses comes back to set the record straight, reprising her role as the Palin-Fangirl Sass Attacker. BASTARD SON!! SLUT FOR A WIFE! I love it when you talk dirty about Letterman's family to me...
(call me)

Just when you wrote him off an an insignificant moron that yells at the crowd, the indecisive do-I-ignore-or-slap-her guy is back to interact with the normal people going about their daily life. He appears worldly as he discusses the weak points of socialism (ITS EVIL!!!). A woman wearing a pink shirt tries to communicate using her inside voice (dumb bitch. WE NEED MORE YELLING), but Indecisive Guy slams her fragment of an argument with maturity of a 12 year old girl who owns the Spice Girl movie: the 'Oh No You Did'ent' finger wave and snap! Oh yes he did. Go away pink shirt lady, you just got served!

Effeminate backtalk dating to old school 1993, although hilarious and totally appropriate, detracts from the situation. Some red bearded guy takes control and refocuses everyone on what's truly important, yelling "enough is enough" he holds up a 'I'm a Right Wing Lunatic' poster. Good thing too. I almost didn't realize who I was watching. Back on track with tangets, Big Glasses tells us that her economics degree has the answer to our world enconomy crisis: we need to close down our boarders for 20 years and 'clean our own house' (I assume she means that we should collect all the spare change to be found under the sofa).

Okay, so some people have drifted off topic. I can picture someone in the center of the rally saying "I forgot, why the hell are we rallying outside of Letterman's studio again?" Luckily, at least one person remembers why they're there and she seeks to unite them once again! "KEEP CHILDREN SAFE FROM DAVID LETTERMAN'S MOUTH! HE WILL RAPE THEM WITH HIS MOUTH!" That's right! I almost forgot! Letterman is a pedophile (why not)! It totally slipped my mind! I guess I'll have to grab my torch and pitchfork and riot to the streets... unless I get distracted by drunk guys pretending to make out... ... ... OhSnap! Lady, do not look directly behind you! (I guess the policeman likes to watch?) I sure hope the guy who only watches Fox News doesn't turn around, or they'll rape his eyes with their tongues! Typically you would need to maturity of a teenager to handle that kind of PG 13 action, these protesters would be scared for life.

I rate this 4 out of 5 (Internet) Movie Ferrets.

Remember kids, if you want to be a professional grownup, post your injustices on to your Facebook page.

A Critical View of the Eastern European Trade in the 14th Century and its Relevance to the Modern World

2009-06-17T11:33:00.000-05:00

I apologize for my blog in the past week. I have failed to deliver short mildly entertaining snippets and instead have had several entries in a row that are all deep and shit. This blog is called Basically Bland, not Possibly Pretentious; I need to stay true to its heritage. You know what's not pretentious though? Fuzz-butts. Awwww.

Ferrets are so far from anything close to deep, soul searching or critical thinking.

Relationships

2009-06-16T11:31:00.000-05:00

Relationships sure are tricky. Especially romantic relationships. Society today puts a high value on them, but at the same time doesn't exactly define what they're good for. Some say its about property, kids, God, or never ending love, but these all fail as even general catch all definitions.

By far, the most popular definition of a successful relationship is eternal looove. While desirable, it ultimately turns for an idea to live for into an ideal that marks failure. When you try to implement 'eternal' anything for the sake of a constant never ending presence, you get an inevitable life span race; here, a romantic relationship is really seen as a success only when one of the pair croaks. If two people are romantically involved and don't separate until they die, it's a success. If two people are romantically involved and separate due to living conditions, the relationship is a failure. Most people would agree with the above if they blindly subscribe to the idea eternal romance. As examples of success and failure, the above examples are as clear cut as they come, the trade scenarios.

Develop that logic further, and one can begin to encounter less complete social solidarity and can even risk cognitive dissonance. By this logic, if two people are romantic, and one partner is abusive to the other but they stay together regardless until the abused commits suicide, that relationship is a success! If a couple stays together for a period of time and then calmly separates because they both find they don't love each other romantically like they used to anymore, then their relationship is an utter failure despite a lack of any injury.

If a young couple gets married and one partner dies a week later in a car accident? SUCCESS! What if an middle aged couple finds they've drifted apart after marrying young and then decided to separate? The 10-15 years of 'successful-not-dead-yet' relationship time are null and void as FAILURE.

I think its ridiculous to go out looking to make romantic relationships only worth something if they haven't been proven to end yet (or treating Death as a gold star to put on your relationship resume). People enter into relationships because they feel like they get something from them; if both people find themselves happy and their lives are enriched by having experienced that relationship, then I would say that it was a success (even if people didn't die soon enough to make it popularly official). I might be naive and immature, but I look for relationships as a boon for personal growth than a 'lets keep this thing chugging for the sake of officialdom' GigaPet. No one really liked GigaPets. They got annoying.

Ramble Elderly

2009-06-15T18:10:00.000-05:00

When I think of growing old, I'm always filled with a mixture of eagerness and dread. I think of all the time I have left; all the things I want to do and all the experiences waiting to happen. It makes me want to simultaneously sit down and study for everything and jump up, run around flailing in excitement. I also look at the slow drawn out death a lot of elderly people are doomed to. Moving gets painful, the mind and memories become endangered, and various systems just get worn out. It makes me want to sulk in my room and not venture outside for fear of incurring injury, wear, and tear.

Although people die in a multitude of ways, more commonly now it's not a digital switch. There isn't a stark line between vibrant life and resting death. Thanks to modern technology a new class has emerged, allowing many to slowly settle into more of a 'vibrant death'.

When I was younger, I looked at modern medicine as a way to prolong life, and certainly it does. But it's not the yellow brick road to immortality I once imagined it to be. I would argue that in spite of any level of technological advancement it won't ever be anything more than a delay of the inevitable. One might say its because of the way modern medicine markets itself (more endures than cures, if I might rhyme). I could even believe that on a subconscious level, no one really wants to live forever. I think its misleading to think of life continuing equally and indefinitely until pronounced dead. It belittles the opportunities of the present day to assume a person will always be capable of doing whatever they want.

I firmly believe that the quality of life cannot be guaranteed simply by pretending there's infinite sand in the hour glass and deluding yourself that there will always be more time for things later. Rather each advancement should be seen as birthing opportunities instead of delaying death. Nursing homes are proof enough that an EEG doesn't guarantee a person is still living.

Giving Kids an Edge

2009-06-14T16:54:00.000-05:00

Television and books for kids today feels different than I remember. Starting in late elementary school, I began reading what became the most influential book series for my teen years. Don't laugh. Animorphs.
Animorphs had everything a preteen kid could want in a book series. It had action, violence, imagination, and most importantly, a heaping dose of angst. I was drawn into the series for its casual dialogue, cookie cutter drama, and it's descriptions of kids transforming into animals to fight evil aliens (seriously how cool is that?). Unlike many other similar kids series however, a gradually changing mood coursed of all 50-something books, lending an immense amount of depth to the series as a whole. What I remember most about Animorphs now is that it was the first story whose ending utterly disgusted me when I read it. It was well written, pertinent to wrapping up the story, and it single-handedly destroyed every single one of the characters I grew up loving.

With its ending, Animorphs became the first story I was completely engaged in that ended on the complete opposite side of where I wanted it to end. It would probably be melodramatic to say that was my moment of disillusionment, but certainly it was the first story that ended with a jarring outside-the-story-book-world message. Six kids manage to uphold their friendships and moral ideals when united by a common goal as a guerrilla force focused on surviving the war until help can arrive. But a war of difficult, mind breaking decisions takes its toll when the time comes to finally end it; the aftermath leaving the survivors detached and unfucntionable in the world they save. Lately I looked at what is marketed to kids of the same age and I don't see anything comparable to my old Animorphs.

Is society drifting away from harsh "reality" themes for more pleasing cultural ideals or am I just too distant from what kids are reading? I'm optimistically inclined to think the later, but realistically I think probably both.

Nintendo Fitness.

2009-06-11T08:23:00.000-05:00

Nintendo unveiled an upgrade to it's WiiFit product, which was put on the market just a short year and a half ago. Rather than being a lone incident, I would say that the prevalence of similar games show that actual physical fitness is something doomed to be further integrated in video game culture. Video Games originated with black and white pixels that came with explanations. That triangle, well that's a space ship; those blocky things? Those are asteroids. It's since progressed into an enveloping 3D immersion of simulated life and stories. Realistic graphics and physics marketed to sell do nothing but invite players with a breif glimpse a better life. Sandbox RPGs especially, with stunning graphics and customizable human characters as the perfection of humanity are the crux of the industry rising to meet consumer's demands of personal perfection. It only makes sense that the next step players finding themselves wondering is how to translate this utter bliss into their real life. Visiting the zoo and looking at happiness though shatter proof glass just isn't enough anymore.

Nintendo in particular has begun to answer this call. The WiiFit was advertised to be an entertainment game that would direct physical fitness novices toward a healthier and assumeidly more fulfilling lifestyle. I say 'advertise' because much like all other forms of exercise equipment, the Wiifit more often than not fails in itself to make any real changes in the lives of it's buyers. Once the novelty wears off, it lays dusted over and forgotten tucked under the TV. In spite of this failure the market still exists and Nintendo keeps trying to reach out and satisfy the desires of a video crowd no longer content to play in a virtual world at the expense of their physical real world existence.

Wiifit, My Weight Loss Coach, and My Fitness Coach are only early iterations of what could be a passing trend, but I what I think is more likely the next evolution of video games. The Wiifit is getting a new iteration, the Wiifit Plus and even the upcoming Pokmeon games age getting in on the act; HeartGold and SoulSilver, which will come with a separate pedometer into which a single Pocket Monster can be loaded into and trained by the steps you take outside in the real world. I have to say that I approve of this shift. The video game market presents the unique opportunity to allow much of the hardware necessary for light exercise and information to be largely available; the software can be easily distributed. Perhaps most importantly the market is already willing to try out such trends so long as they promise an enjoyable experience. Playing with a balance board or 'walking' Pokemon peripherals aren't going to single handily end the obesity epidemic, but I see nothing but positive outcomes for expanding and developing this market.

After spending nearly a year with the first WiiFit, I can see a future iteration of the Wiifit being successful as a fun and interactive daily guide towards more physical fitness in the lives of Americans. But only if it changes to meet additional criteria. At the top of the list of things to change is putting in a more accurate evaluation system. Currently the Wiifit bases it's judgment of Obese, Overweight, Normal, Underweight, etc off of the user's BMI; it compares an ideal weight to height and does not consider normal proportioned more skinny or thicker body types as acceptable. Automatically this discourages a large proportion of users. No matter how effectively they implement their workout, their healthy weight can be deemed by the system as inappropriate. This system does not encourage prolonged use. Also, the Wiifit sacrifices the customization one might expect from a video game marketed as 'fun' for a one size fits all, unchanging screen from which one can select individual workouts. A future system needs the ability to create, save, and track full workouts instead of relying the user to make up a new one at every use. Lastly, the Wiifit fails to take advantage of the other huge difference between a modern console game and a Bowflex (or other infomercial machine): connectivity.

If there's one thing that discourages people most while seeking fitness its the lonely discouragement of thinking you're the odd man out. The thing is though, is that most everyone is the the odd man out. The odd mans out is the majority. If users who don't have the metabolism and genetics to become a Greek God (or Goddess... ladies...) only knew just how unashamed they should be, who knows some of them might actually enjoy a little exercise. The Wiifit made a halfhearted effort in this direction by showing all the users on a single Wii on the home screen with graphs marking weight losses and gains, but this mock attempt fails to connect people as needed for encouragement and instead just leads to envy. I'd like to see a friend system established, allowing you to send compliments to online friends for fulfilling their weight goals or at least some regional averages to showing realistic expectations; the other people rowing in your boat.

We're All Victims Apparently...

2009-06-09T22:47:00.000-05:00

I get tired of watching TV. It's not because of commercials; no for every racial minority McDonalds hires to sing their jingle in an obvious effort to appear more urban-hip, Sonic or Skittles gives me something not half bad. No, I get tired of watching TV because in a misguided effort to pretend to be informed I turn to the talking heads of 'newsish' TV.

Let me say that I'm not an intellectual. I don't have the attention span to cannnnnndy. I don't have the attention span to actually keep up with on going stories for long enough periods of time to really feel like I understand them completely. Instead I more or less wade through the wide diversity of pressing issues I'm presented with in the news as though someone asked me for my gut-uninformed-opinion. Everything from 'obesity is a growing problem' to the endless, bloody civil war in Shrilanka is categorized in vague pigeon holes between 'Duh!' and 'I feel like watching Peanut Butter more often'.

I get sick and tired of everyone on TV claiming they're the victim. There are victims of poverty, victims of murder, and one could even extend that to larger minorities such as gays, blacks, and black gays. The loudest whiners though don't belong to any minority group; the spokesperson for the majority keeps using its more widespread sympathy and influence to whine the most nail-grating temper tantrum imaginable. It's so ridiculous that large empowered groups of people holding the majority over spans of the US are somehow being kept under the thumb of the (little) man. Christianity, the most popular(ly crazy) religion in the US is now being attacked by the gays. The new supreme court appointment was an affirmative action pick to persecute the often down trodden white male American. This is all so ridiculous. The only thing more ridiculous is the fact that people actually start believing it all. The last time I went home all I heard about was the travesty of Mz California losing her right of free speech.

'it's a sign of how we are all losing our rights to stand up for beliefs'
It's depressing when the adults around here act really stupid.

lowl catz

2009-06-03T20:57:00.000-05:00

Tracy came back to the apartment today! Patches McGee, the resident preteen female came back with looking a little heavier. It's a real life Bristle-Levi romance here at the apartment now. Patches is preggers, proving once and for all that supervision-abstinence is not the best way to stop teenage cat pregnancy. No the number one way to avoid teenage cat pregnancy is not to teenage cats. Howard Benson doesn't seem to concern himself with his future of be a teenage cat dad, and unfortunately Patches is the victim of a society that praises him for his conquests and frowns upon her poor teenage cat choices.

In her defense, after receiving Tracy's cat abstinence only education, she did try to compromise and consented to infertile and potentially dangerous alternative sex practices. Unfortunately, with their minimal knowledge of anatomy they collectively were unable to know exactly what they were supposed to avoid doing.

Back

2009-06-02T21:25:00.000-05:00

I'm finally starting to settle into A&M classes again. I keep feeling paranoid walking around campus and talking to people. I feel like people will realize I sneaked back in and assemble a huge mob to oust me.

Hair Cuts

2009-06-01T20:55:00.000-05:00

I decided to finally bite the bullet and get a hair cut. Hair is annoying. It keeps on growing long after you want it to stop. It's like a never ending war you can't win; like fighting a tide trying to drag you out to an ocean of being a dirty hippie. That goes doubly for facial hair. I scouted by the cheapest place I know of in town, on the look out for a certain someone who I distinctly remembered being unable to follow simple instructions and turning my head into a palm tree. I like Counting Crows, but I whole heartedly entrust Adam's unique hair style to him. I don't need any part of it rooted into my scalp.

Despite my best efforts though the exact same lady appeared out of nowhere and called me up for the deed. After the initial 'F me' moment I was impressed that she actually did a decent job, remembering (or reading in the database) everything I told her to do the time before, only this time I liked it. I think that she remembered me as that difficult guy who left her no tip, because just before I got up to go pay she stopped for an awkward serious moment and she said 'we value your business.'

There is nothing scarier than someone I don't know remembering me.

Up

2009-05-31T21:52:00.001-05:00

The new Pixar movie, Up wasn't exactly what I expected. It follows an elderly man, Carl, who has outlived his deceased wife. He reflects on an adventure they talked about in their childhood and never accomplished and floats his house away in an attempt to live out the dream he and his wife never could: living in and exploring the remote region Paradise Falls. The movie balances bright and childlike themes with the deep sadness the main character feels in undertaking his journey; Balloons remain a common motif as Carl uses them (as a former balloon salesmen) to float both his house and his wife's childhood dreams. Accompanying Carl is a small boy scout seeking to earn his 'assisting the elderly' badge and a host of animals they meet on their journey to set Carl's house on Paradise Falls before his balloons run out of air.

I was surprised by this movie. Pixar movies are reliably good, and this is no exception. What surprised me is the emotionally draining this movie is. Unlike Wall-e (my all time favorite) or Finding Nemo, Up is a movie that almost requires the viewer to be a particular mood, and then from that caters to it extremely well. I recommend seeing this movie when you're in a somber mood only.Up, although for the most part maintaining a mood distinctly more depressing than that of normal Pixar movies, is fantastic and especially in its beautiful, thematic metaphors. I give it 4.5 out of 5 Movie Ferrets.

Terminator Salvation

2009-05-28T01:23:00.000-05:00

I never saw the first Terminator, nor did I see the second. I did, however, catch the third one and while I found myself confused and disappointed with the an anticlimactic ending, I followed the story and was drawn into the movie by the action. I approached Terminator Salvation with this background of expecting little more than a few big explosions, some killer robots, and at least one well done chase sequence. This movie fantastically exceeded any expectation that I had of how disappointing a movie could be. This movie is bad.

This movie fails to deliver anything but the sensation that I could have better spent my time playing Animal Crossing on the Nintendo Wii. The graphics are acceptable, it uses character established and fleshed out (I presume) in previous movies, and it made plenty of efforts to acknowledge and reference the past movies (so I'm told). However the execution of it all was terrible. Christain Bale plays the role of John Connor, someone I spent the entire movie not caring about. He spends most of the movie acting like a whiney little bitch. He doesn't spend time directing people or in combat, instead he just watches people do things other people higher up told them to do already! He seems completely unnecessary to the entire plot! He breaks up this string of non-action by throwing temper tantrums at his superiors. He seems more like the kind of guy who lives in his mother's basement when he's 45, yelling at her upstairs that he needs more pizza bagels. On the rare occasions he does venture out into the field, everyone around this guy dies. Why the hell do they keep sending him on missions if all they do is get everyone killed and accomplish next to nothing?!

I'm not sure if it was because of writing or the direction (although it was probably both), but John Connor is one of the most emotionally distant characters to watch on a movie screen. He never consults with any other particular character, instead he just whines and tantrums at whoever is in the proximity. He doesn't seem to have any friends and no-one ever seems to like him for any reason. He has a love interest: a medic-wife who is clearly in the late term of her pregnancy with what I can only assume is his child, but every scene they have together is so coldly formalized that I began to doubt they ever could have married in the past. I began to doubt the obvious pregnancy because no character, especially John or his wife, ever makes mention to it. Eventually I reconciled that she just had cancer, from all the nuclear explosions occurring every 20 minutes, and it had for whatever reason taken the shape of an 8th month pregnancy.

The explosions in this movie are plentiful and serve no particular purpose. It's like a five year old playing with air planes and motorcycles got to decided when collisions were appropriate. And in this movie, for every high speed collision a machine makes with another machine, there's a random robot fight sequence. During the robot fights I literally found myself cringing, it wasn't because of the tense drama or the amazing effects. No, it was because these super strength robots kept fighting mere humans, lifting boulders and crap, and the humans kept escaping without a scratch. For being human 'terminators' these robots were terrible at their job. Every time one grabbed a person I'd think 'holy crap that thing could tear off his arm and beat him to death with it' but that never happens! Instead the robots throw people into walls or try to wrestle them to the ground. I remember in Terminator 3 the antagonist robot punched her fist through the driver seat AND the driver of a truck before steering it after the main character. Swarzenagar shaped humanoids twice her size can't hold a 5 year olds arm? The only thing that makes less sense is the ending. I need to talk about the ending, enhanced with all the spoilers I can pile on. So if you plan on seeing this terrible movie with your own money and don't want it ruined STOP READING NOW (although just seeing the actual movie itself ruins the movie experience).

The only remotely interesting character is half human-half robot cyborg who has to choose between the two sides. He dies in the end for no adequately explained reason. His character undergoes a decent amount of development, he actually gets a love interest that he shows affection for, and the story makes an attempt to explore the strengths, weaknesses, and social ramifications of being part human and part machine in this war. However just before managing to destroy the main complex John Connor gets stabbed clear through the chest with a rusty piece of metal and is later carried to safety. He's laid out in the medical area by his wife (who doesn't seem to particularly care) who tells everyone that John is going to die 'because his heart can't take it'. The cyborg offers to donate his human heart to John in order to save his life. How the hell is John even alive?! What exactly can't his heart take? It was ahnintliated by a jagged piece of metal! What the hell did that hit going through the dead center of his chest to cause only his heart in particular barely mortal stress. A quick or irregular heart beat causes stress. A leaky heart valve or a clogged artery causes stress. Hell high blood pressure causes stress! He had a huge damn piece of metal shoved clean through his rib cage! How the hell is he alive?! And how is this the perfect time to do an organ transplant?! Apparently in the future, organ transplants can be done of the fly, with no need to consult blood or tissue types, and are always completely successful... with no chance of failure as that would be something someone would consider before killing a perfectly healthy (much more interesting) individual to possibly save some douche bag.

The ending of the movie gets even more stupid and pointless. In addition to fighting machines another sub plot revolves around finding John Connors father to send him back in time to impregnate his mother (how romantic is that?). However they never actually send him back, he just rides off into the sunset with the gang... off on another whirlwind adventure no doubt (why the hell not). After all of this drawn out time and effort enduring this movie, John narrates that the war isn't over and that Skynet is still a fully functional global presence sending its machines to kill off humanity. Well then what the hell was the point of this movie. Why did I sit though all this crap if it didn't even matter to these Fictional people?

As I said before this was a terrible movie. It will probably squeak by on ticket sales just riding on the back of it's predecessors, but make no mistake, no one under their own free will should have to endure this terrible mess of plot bunnies and misplaced CGI effects.

I give this movie 1 out of 5 Movie Ferrets.

Art Schooled

2009-05-25T10:55:00.000-05:00

My pitiful failure of a comic needed some reviving. That's why I thought of maybe paying someone to color it in for me. If I didn't have to worry about coloring it, then I could already start drawing and tracing the next one. Man that would be exciting.

The only website I knew of that had commission hire postings, but was still a little informal was DeviantArt.com So I posted the job. Color my 20 small pictures for a stupid comic and I pay you $30 (in more detail than that). I thought it seemed simple enough, but boy was I wrong! Apparently a lot of people don't actually read what jobs are being offered and just 'copy-paste' reply "I'm interested. Here's my gallery [link]." So when I started contacting these people who responded to my post, I managed to offend all of them. Was I really only paying $30? How insulting! What! You answered my ad! Despite all my best efforts to be as polite as possible, in flows the hate mail. If you didn't like the offer, then don't respond or at least make a recommendation! Artists are weird!

2009-05-19T17:39:00.000-05:00

I woke up feeling a distinctly strange mixture of being refreshed from full night's sleep, and being sick. It wasn't an illness, as far as I could tell, something in the weather of Las Vegas didn't agree with my sinuses. My head felt like it had doubled in weight and the pressure difference moving from the top floor of the hotel to the ground left me deaf my left ear. Not one of be discouraged, Giggles and I ventured out on our own, to pick up tickets and explore more of Vegas. We a cab to the strip. Outside of Paris we got ice cream smoothies to energize our day mission. It was a long trip, but getting inside and exploring the Venetian was worth it. Exploring is exactly what we did too, because of bad directions to the Phantom ticket booth. When we finally did get there we both wished that Blackmail or Moonshine were there. Neither one of us knew which seats were best to pick. We picked some out that seemed decent and hoped for the best. After that we wondered the upper levels of the mall area. The main attraction of the Venetian is of course the illusion of Venice Italy, complete with gondola boats moving around the indoor waterways. Considering the original Venice water canal doubles as a sewer system, the pristine clear blue waters of this mock up made me very aware that what I was experiencing was a romanticized fraud, but it was still a beautiful place.

We also went a head and bought tickets to the wax musiem. Here wax statues of famous people stood for people to pose and mock for their own enjoyment. Giggles got to poke Oprah Winfrey's nose and shook the hand of porn star Jenna Jameson (well a porn star handshake). I realized how short Mathew MacConnaughey really is, refused George Clooney's wedding proposal (they had him set up in a chapel for some reason), and scolded Lucy for beaking my babaloo drums. Hilarity ensued all around. I was surprised how much fun it can be making fun of well known people to their own prop faces. Before we left, Giggles offered to go see Blue Man Group with me the next day, so we bought our tickets.

Leaving the Venetian, we were surprised to run into the girls. What were the odds of that happening?! The two of us decided to head back however, hit up the M&M store on the way back, buy a day pass on the Monorail, and take the shuttle back to the hotel to get ready for Phantom of the Opera. M&M World was a massive store four floors tall. They sold the actual candy, various dispensers, plushy toys, jewelery (?), and other shenanigans. I went a little crazy when I saw the 'fill your own bag' wall of colored candy and spent beyond my reason (Oops). I happily left with a massive bag of mostly orange and gray M&Ms (for whatever reason they were out of red and blue). The monorail turned out to be surprisingly helpful getting us back to the shuttle site. We ended up using the hell out of that one day pass. Unfortunately the shuttle service for our hotel was pitiful. We waiting for close to an hour (it was advertised as making 15 minute trips) and ended up being so late that we had to pay for a cab to drive us back to the Venetian to make it on time.

Phantom of the Opera was definitely one of the major highlights of the trip. I'll write up a formal review for it, as just mentioning it here wouldn't do it justice (and I have no corresponding DSi photos). Afterward, we wondered the nearby Cesar's Palace to rummage for food. We were all dressed up so this outing became our 'fancy dinner'. Hotel staff pointed us in the right direction, to a ritzy upstairs establishment. I don't remember the name of it, but it was so fancy they poured our free tap water from chilled glass decanters. It had been another long day, Benny and I retired and left the girls to go on another night out.

"And I Guess I'll See You Monday Like Before"

2009-05-18T17:35:00.000-05:00

Amie and V arrived way too early for my interest. After that long first day I wanted nothing more than to be a bum. Fortunately, I wasn't alone in my opinion. The group decided that it was time to venture down to the pool. Our hotel was Cancun themed, with a big Mayan square pyramid in the center between it's two pools. Everyone else jumped in, but me a Blackmail took the agonizing slow route to getting in: step by step. Giggles splashed me because he's an asshole and that's exactly what assholes do to people getting into swimming pools: they splash. There was a hot tub under the pyramid and water slides coming off the back. Those were fun. The dry weather was starting to play a number on me so I went looking for a decongestant.

The girls (which will now denote everyone in our party aside from Giggles and me) wanted to go back to New York New York so they might buy large boot shaped alcoholic beverages in the shape of boots from the Coyote Ugly bar (It's a real place, but it still doesn't ask for a sequel). Giggles and me got something equally delicious down the shop line: ice cream smoothies. From there we set off to buy tickets for shows! Blackmail wanted to see Phantom of the Opera; I had heard nothing but awesome things about Blue Man Group. The place for both of those was the Venetian, a hotel/casino place much further down the strip. We went walking, passing famous places such as Paris and the famous Vegas CVS-Pharmacy/Walgreens-across-the-street combination. Wow some of these casinos are really into their themes!

From there we went to What was probably my favorite hotel: The Bellagio. I cannot say enough about how awesome the Bellagio was. It looked clean, was tied into the mall, and the lobby had more than cheesy theme props. The Bellagio had a small gallery room set up with a garden theme. The entire floor of it was covered in flowers, with hanging watering cans and water fountains. It was pretty surreal, which for Vegas is the norm... so surreal in Vegas is something like all out crazy in real life. I may have liked the Bellagio so much because they had a whole room with neat stuff and nobody in it tried to make my buy crap or gamble, but I digress. We left through the mall. Giggles and I out paced the girls pretty quickly, who were slogging along pretty slow, and he stopped because he wanted to buy a Gucci wallet (with a Gucci logo and it was in Gucci packaging and he could carry it in a Gucci bag). Apparently it doesn't matter what city or who I go with, the mall is f*@%ing boring.

Cesar's Palace was next on our list of milestones to cross. The inside was, as one would expect, filled with Greek/Roman themed stuff (I'm not really sure which, and honestly who cares). The thing I remember most about it was the number of overpriced restaurants that were abundantly open. We got tangled up inside the hotel and then had chase after Moonshine who wondered off towards a huge naked man.

Needless to say, this was the limit of our excursion. Our group was pooped out and we gave up on making it to the Venetian. The wear and tear of drunken walking hit its limit and we turned back. Apparently there was a ticket booth that we could reserve at outside of Paris (that was always fun to say). We made for that instead. Before leaving Cesar's Palace though we did pass by this really cool looking restaurant, it had massive amounts of goldfish tanked up for walls. I wish we could have afforded to eat there. In any event, we ended up buying Phantom of the Opera tickets for the next day. I gave up on Blue Man Group because they were expensive and no one really wanted to see them with me. Once we got back the everyone started getting ready for the night life. I was out of energy so I sat down the bed with the intentions of planning out the rest of our stay but instantly fell asleep.

"Shake the Glitter Off Your Clothes"

2009-05-17T16:24:00.000-05:00

I spent the late/early morning hours packing and generally ransacking my apartment as the roommates watched. Some time around 4:00 our group circled up and departed CS-town. I don't really remember much. Blackmail drove me and Giggles (who was demoted from another name) to go pick up Moonshine, someone who is worse at packing than me! We made it to Houston around 5:00 or so and then Blackmail's mama drove us all to the airport (6:00). The sun started peaking out around our departure time (7:00) and I flew off to Vegas too tired to recall much from what my dead-people class showed me in respect to airline crashes.

We spent a large part of the day wondering around the strip waiting for our hotel room to be ready. We all sat down at MGM's slots, mostly for the sake of sitting down, and simultaneously learned one thing: never play the F*@%ing slots. Across the street from the lion themed casino was New York... or something like it. Moonshine and Giggles left me and Blackmail in a massive arcade to ride a roller coater (I assume named New York Stock Exchange). I tried to play two different Jurassic Park shooter games, but found them both to be broken money eaters. Those two were not the exception in that arcade, but the rule; like the slots in the casino lobby, those games were out of calibration... broken, rundown, and probably covered in some new strain of hepatitis. New York New York provides a casino and arcade experience surprisingly similar to the actual New York city!

We bought groceries and finally retired to our hotel room for some much needed sleep before preparing for nightlife activities. Moonshine, the only one capable of accessing the internet, tracked our night to go through a string of gay clubs the internets referred to affectionally as the 'fruit loop'. Unfortunately, Moonshine didn't look at the walking distance to said locations, leading Blackmail to walk 2 miles in shoes unbefitting, further impairing group movement for the rest of the trip. Gypsy featured a more small town feel and a drag show featuring several talented girls (note to editor: add question marks at the end of every verb and noun in the last sentence). Ultimately I was assaulted by a plus sized drag queen, something Giggles was all too happy about. Across the street was another gay club featuring a room blasting tejano music and in another, go-go boys wearing awkward attire that made me vicariously embarrassed.

Finally we hobbled down to the Hard Rock casino and ate dinner at a restaurant showing a Steven Segual movie. It was a long day. All of us were ready to pass out in the cab ride home, wondering how we were going to get up the next day. I guess that's what you get, for waking up in Vegas.

"Days Go By"

2009-05-16T22:11:00.000-05:00

I haven't updated for a while. I blame a certain someone enabling me to buy a certain DSi. I've spent so much time playing the damn addicting thing that I've decided to do a review of it. In fact lately I think I want to do more review of other things. However, the next string of days will be chronicling my summer vacation IN VEGAS! I'm set to leave in about 8 hours. Typically I'm better at packing light and efficient for trips, but this time I'm not sure what to include. I keep hearing about dress codes for clubs, shows, and restaurants. Of all the things I excel at, being semi-formal isn't one of them. Now how am I going to cram all of my clothes and crap into a single carry on.

Emo Crayons

2009-04-27T22:58:00.000-05:00

As one of my many contributions to the angsty youth, I would like to market the following product:
Crayons for Emos

Your really not supposed to use all the colors, instead you let the bright ones congregate like clones over their happy fairy tale lives while you delve deep into the blackness of your soul...

OOooOOooo Dark...

People are Gay

2009-04-26T23:52:00.000-05:00

I was working my usual closing shift recently when I walked by a strange conversation two of my coworkers were having. A summary of the conversation went something to the effect of "I'm not homophobic. One or two is cool, I just don't like large groups. It's scary." Instantly my mind conjured how he walked home shaking every night, terrified of some wild roving gang of homosexuals should... beat the hell out of him? steal his money to go buy expensive electronics at Best Buy? I have no idea. What in the world would a large number of people grouped solely by their sexual preference want with this guy? I guess he must think he's hot stuff and presumes, what with the marauding hordes of females who sexually assault him at all times of the day, that if a man gang caught sight of him it would just be the finishing blow. (heh) I wish I had that self confidence...

FERRETZZZ!!!

2009-04-24T00:14:00.000-05:00

I made this video to send to my roommate away from roommates, because she still hasn't been back to see I got ferrets.

Conrad's 'Heart of Darkness'

2009-04-22T16:30:00.000-05:00

Heart of Darkness is a book that gets a lot of crap. I haven't met anyone else who ever enjoyed reading it, but I think that has more to do with understanding the premise of the book. I couldn't even tell this was written in English by the author as his third language. For one thing, the framing device threw me off.

A seaman on a boat in England tells all the bored passengers a story of when he went to Africa and traveled up the Congo River... that story frames the character Kurtz. Kurtz is a genius who seems to excel at everything he does and was hired to run the inner most station along the Congo River. Marlow, the seaman, hears rumors about Kurtz and slow pieces his character together by talking to people at each station along the river.

The station at the mouth of the river is run efficiently, although cruel to the natives; the accountant says Kurtz is a man of endless possibility and admires his ability to organize. At the next station shows no progress, the manager does shows little emotion and simply maintains the status quo; he acknowledges Kurtz potential and obscene success in the ivory trade and tries to defend his position from being overtaken by Kurtz's proficiency. At the last station, Marlow meets a wondering trader who lives closely with Kurtz. Like the local natives, he has come to worship Kurtz's genius as Godlike.

Kurtz has become cruel without civilization, gaining massive amounts of ivory by setting the native tribes against each other and displaying the heads of 'rebels' all over his compound. However this is ignored by the natives and the trader who conclude that a man so great and wondrous as Kurtz can no longer be judged as other men. The deathly ill Kurtz is carried back to the ship for transport for health care and Marlow finally has a chance to talk with and evaluate Kurtz first hand; something he spends most of the book anticipating as he gathered bits of Kurtz's legendary capacity. I don't want to spoil the ending, but it's a one; I like it more as I continue to think about it.

Juggle

2009-04-20T13:31:00.000-05:00

It's annoying when professors move dates around. A test moved to Thursday makes a paper due Tuesday. It's a crazy balancing act.