Relationships

Relationships sure are tricky. Especially romantic relationships. Society today puts a high value on them, but at the same time doesn't exactly define what they're good for. Some say its about property, kids, God, or never ending love, but these all fail as even general catch all definitions.

By far, the most popular definition of a successful relationship is eternal looove. While desirable, it ultimately turns for an idea to live for into an ideal that marks failure. When you try to implement 'eternal' anything for the sake of a constant never ending presence, you get an inevitable life span race; here, a romantic relationship is really seen as a success only when one of the pair croaks. If two people are romantically involved and don't separate until they die, it's a success. If two people are romantically involved and separate due to living conditions, the relationship is a failure. Most people would agree with the above if they blindly subscribe to the idea eternal romance. As examples of success and failure, the above examples are as clear cut as they come, the trade scenarios.

Develop that logic further, and one can begin to encounter less complete social solidarity and can even risk cognitive dissonance. By this logic, if two people are romantic, and one partner is abusive to the other but they stay together regardless until the abused commits suicide, that relationship is a success! If a couple stays together for a period of time and then calmly separates because they both find they don't love each other romantically like they used to anymore, then their relationship is an utter failure despite a lack of any injury.

If a young couple gets married and one partner dies a week later in a car accident? SUCCESS! What if an middle aged couple finds they've drifted apart after marrying young and then decided to separate? The 10-15 years of 'successful-not-dead-yet' relationship time are null and void as FAILURE.

I think its ridiculous to go out looking to make romantic relationships only worth something if they haven't been proven to end yet (or treating Death as a gold star to put on your relationship resume). People enter into relationships because they feel like they get something from them; if both people find themselves happy and their lives are enriched by having experienced that relationship, then I would say that it was a success (even if people didn't die soon enough to make it popularly official). I might be naive and immature, but I look for relationships as a boon for personal growth than a 'lets keep this thing chugging for the sake of officialdom' GigaPet. No one really liked GigaPets. They got annoying.